Parenting has transformed me in ways I never imagined over the past nine years. If my first-time parent self could encounter my current self, it might go something like this:
(knock on the door)
First-Time Parent Me:
Excuse me. Hi there! Sorry to intrude, but did you know your child is out in the front yard by themselves?
Present-Day Me:
Oh, really? That’s totally fine. We do it all the time.
First-Time Parent Me:
Oh. Aren’t you worried they’ll run into the street or something worse?
Present-Day Me:
Not particularly. I’m honestly more concerned about a neighbor reporting me. Wait, are you new to the block?
First-Time Parent Me:
No, I just drove by and thought I should check in. What if a tree branch falls? Or a bee stings them? And I just noticed they’re not wearing shoes!
Present-Day Me:
Yeah, I remind him to put shoes on. But, you know how three-year-olds can be…
First-Time Parent Me:
(momentarily speechless)
Present-Day Me:
Oh, don’t worry. He’ll be alright.
First-Time Parent Me:
I could just sit with him if you’re busy.
Present-Day Me:
Nah, that’s not necessary. I’m never not busy! Unless you want to move in… haha.
First-Time Parent Me:
(still speechless)
Present-Day Me:
Want to come in? You look exhausted – take a nap on the couch!
First-Time Parent Me:
That sounds heavenly! I barely sleep anymore. My baby is teething, so I’m up every couple of hours.
Present-Day Me:
Come on in! I was about to let the three-year-old watch TV while I worked. Your little one can join him.
First-Time Parent Me:
Thanks, but she’s already had her 30 minutes of educational programming today. That’s my limit.
Present-Day Me:
(laughs hard) You’re joking, right?
First-Time Parent Me:
Nope! Don’t want to mess her up with too much screen time.
Present-Day Me:
Right. (discreetly turns off the TV that’s been playing for hours) Anyway, I’m heating up some nuggets, but let’s be honest, the three-year-old will probably end up with chocolate cake for dinner since the big kids eat so fast. At least he’s consuming something, right?
First-Time Parent Me:
(speechless)
Present-Day Me:
(to the six-year-old) Get off the roof of the car!
First-Time Parent Me:
How many kids do you have?
Present-Day Me:
Three. But some days it feels like I have thirty! It’s a total circus around here.
First-Time Parent Me:
Where’s the other one?
Present-Day Me:
Not sure. I think she’s over at a neighbor’s house.
First-Time Parent Me:
(speechless)
Present-Day Me:
Alright, well, I have a million things to juggle – making a phone call, folding laundry, changing a diaper, figuring out what the three-year-old will eat today, and writing a blog post. So, are we done here?
First-Time Parent Me:
(momentarily at a loss for words) Uh, yeah. Are you sure it’s okay for him to be out here alone?
Present-Day Me:
Oh, I’ll bring him in if it’ll ease your mind. I mean, his brother is out there too, so how bad can it really get? (cries start)
First-Time Parent Me:
Are you going to check on him?
Present-Day Me:
(listens for a moment) That’s not his hurt cry. Totally faking it, can’t you tell?
First-Time Parent Me:
Aren’t you worried? I feel a bit paranoid, but you know, first-time parent here. (laughs nervously)
Present-Day Me:
Oh, I get it. (gives a slightly longer hug) It gets easier, I promise. (whispers) Go home and take a nap while you still can, okay?
For more relatable parenting experiences, check out our blog post on parenting struggles. And if you’re looking for resources on home insemination, visit Medical News Today for more information. You can also find at-home insemination kits to help with your journey.
In summary, parenting evolves over time, and what once seemed daunting becomes second nature. The journey is filled with surprises, laughter, and a lot of love.
Leave a Reply