Parenting
By Dr. Emily Carter
Updated: March 4, 2021
Originally Published: August 28, 2015
Entering the world of parenthood can be daunting, especially when you’re uncertain about what lies ahead. In your quest for guidance and reassurance, you may turn to seasoned parents—those who have navigated the challenges of infancy and can offer insights ranging from breastfeeding tips to assembling a co-sleeper. However, not all experienced parents provide the support you need. Below are eight distinct types of veteran parents that every new parent is likely to encounter.
1. The Baby Whisperer Parent
Often an older relative, perhaps a grandmother, this parent claims to possess an uncanny ability to understand what the baby truly desires. She may inform you, the new mother, that the baby “needs” to be held or fed, typically at the moment she is ready to hand the baby back. If her advice goes unheeded, she might escalate her tactics by adopting the persona of the Ventriloquist Parent.
2. The Ventriloquist Parent
This parent engages in playful baby talk, mimicking the child’s voice during moments of distress. When your newborn cries, the Ventriloquist might hold the baby out and declare, “I’m hungwy!” Such antics can make it difficult to express frustration, as it feels like you’re scolding the baby rather than the parent.
3. The Hazing Parent
Often characterized as the Fraternity Brother Parent, this individual revels in sharing tales of their own parental challenges, often in a way that feels more like hazing than helpful advice. If you express fatigue during pregnancy, they might quip, “Just wait until you have the baby!” This type of parent tends to focus on the extremes of their experiences, creating unnecessary anxiety.
4. The Forgetful Parent
Typically an older sister or someone with school-aged children, the Forgetful Parent offers to help but appears overwhelmed by the basics of infant care. You might witness a fleeting moment of recollection when she instinctively rocks the baby before realizing just how daunting the task can be.
5. The “In My Day” Parent
Commonly an older relative, this parent tends to romanticize past parenting methods, often overlooking modern advancements in child safety and care. They may question your choices regarding things like sunscreen or car seat safety, insisting that their way was better without acknowledging the potential risks involved.
6. The Stealth Feeder Parent
This type of parent often provides an abundance of sugary snacks to your child, resulting in unexpected outcomes. When your toddler returns home with an unusual appetite and vague recollections of a dessert feast, the Stealth Feeder deflects blame by claiming to know what your child truly needed.
7. The Cautionary Parent
This parent typically appears as a stranger who feels compelled to share their concerns about your child’s safety, whether in a store or a supposedly child-proofed environment. While their intentions may seem rooted in care, their comments often suggest that you are not adequately supervising your child.
8. The Angelic Parent
By far the most beneficial of the veteran parents, the Angelic Parent steps in to provide practical support. They bring nourishing meals, hold the baby while you rest, and offer to care for your older child, all while listening empathetically to your concerns about sleep schedules and recovery.
Ideally, new parents will have minimal interactions with the first seven types and form a lasting bond with the Angelic Parent, as they can make the early days of parenting significantly easier. After all, someone has to assemble that co-sleeper.
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Summary
Parenting can be overwhelming, especially for newcomers. Interactions with various types of experienced parents can range from helpful to challenging. Understanding these dynamics can help new parents navigate their early experiences more effectively.