Hey there, kids!
I have some important lessons to share with you about navigating life. The first principle? Avoid being inconsiderate. This encompasses sharing, nurturing empathy, exhibiting kindness, putting in effort, and much more. However, given the current state of our home, it seems I may have overlooked a crucial aspect of not being inconsiderate: please, for the love of all things sacred, put your belongings in their designated places.
Let’s Break It Down for Clarity
All the items scattered throughout our home? Believe it or not, there are specific locations for each one. (Surprising, I know.) Here are some key areas:
The Trash Can
I’m becoming increasingly fatigued from retrieving crushed snack wrappers from the couch cushions. It appears as though our living room is attempting a new flooring trend with granola bar foil. The remnants of string cheese — and sometimes the string cheese itself, half-eaten and well past its prime — are strewn across your bedrooms (where food isn’t even allowed, but we’ll address that later). Juice boxes, tape rolls, crumpled paper, chewed gum, and random outdoor debris all belong in that rectangular container in our kitchen commonly referred to as “the trash” or “the garbage.”
The Dishwasher
It seems you operate under the assumption that when you leave your dirty dishes lying around, a magical fairy will whisk them away and return them sparkling clean. News flash: that fairy is actually “Mom,” and she’s growing increasingly exasperated. Honestly, the time I spend gathering your grimy bowls and stray utensils could be better utilized elsewhere. Fortunately, we possess an appliance in our kitchen designed to clean your dishes for you — all you need to do is place them inside. Just open the door, pull out the rack, insert the dish, and close the door. I know you can remember this sequence because I’ve seen you master complex video games.
The Hamper
I understand that you may not appreciate my taste in home décor, but that tall bin in the laundry room and the smaller ones in each bedroom aren’t just decorative. They serve a purpose! Those bins are where your dirty clothes should go. I shouldn’t find them on the bathroom floor or scattered between your room and the shower; they belong solely in the designated clothes hamper.
The Closet
I comprehend that sometimes you need your shoes quickly when a friend arrives asking you to go on a bike ride. However, it only takes a few seconds to retrieve your shoes from their rightful place. In fact, it might save you time in the long run, considering you often spend several minutes searching for them after kicking them off anywhere but where they belong.
The Toy Box
You know how items are organized on shelves at the grocery store? That’s to prevent chaos — much like your bedroom looks when you neglect to return your toys to their proper place. You know that box specifically for your toys? Yes, it’s called the toy box.
The Toilet
On the topic of appropriate receptacles, let’s address where to place the byproducts of your bodily functions. There is a hole filled with water. Please aim there. And about boogers: they should not be on the walls, wiped on your mattress, or on your fingers. This is why I keep our home stocked with tissues, a handy tool for such matters.
By refreshing your memory on where everything belongs, I hope to create a tidier home. Or at least one that doesn’t leave me in despair over my role as the only housekeeper. You can assist with this, correct? After all, not being inconsiderate starts with treating your mother with respect.
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In summary, maintaining a tidy living space is essential for a harmonious home environment. By placing your items in their designated spots, you contribute to a more organized and pleasant atmosphere.