The recent travel ban proposed by the Trump administration aimed at individuals from specific Muslim-majority nations has sparked considerable outrage. The justification behind it was supposedly to protect the nation from terrorism. But let’s pause for a moment. Who has actually been detained? Doctors, scientists, and even a 5-year-old boy among others. If that’s safety, I’d hate to see what danger looks like.
This led me to reflect on the actual issues that are jeopardizing Americans every day—issues that are undermining the very essence of our society. If we’re going to channel our frustrations somewhere, let’s focus on the right targets. For instance, my neighbor is Muslim, and she’s never once attempted to recruit me into any weird business schemes. Instead of fixating on a community that poses no threat, here are 16 things I’d advocate for banning, in no particular order:
- The Recorder
Known locally as “Satan’s whistle,” this instrument brings nothing but chaos into homes. As a parent, I often find myself wanting to snatch it from my children’s hands and toss it into the fire. It’s time we face the fact: this torture device must be outlawed. - Daylight Saving Time
Waking my kids up in the dark? Just what I needed for a smoother morning routine. At least my car clock is right again—but at what cost? - Over-the-Top Contouring
Ladies, let’s embrace the “less is more” philosophy when it comes to makeup. Those lines and stripes aren’t fooling anyone. And please, can we talk about bushy eyebrows? I spent my teen years perfecting a sleek look; now it seems it’s all about looking like a greasy Groucho Marx. Thanks, Kardashians. - Slime
My child has depleted the entire glue supply in Texas making this gooey madness. Back in my day, we actually used glue for its intended purpose! - “Cash me ousside howbow dah”
Can we put a ban on this phrase? I’d like to declare it as hate speech because I genuinely hate hearing it, and my kids won’t stop saying it. Cash me inside, please, with wine corks for earplugs! - Truck Nutz
The other day, I was stuck behind a truck blasting country music with those ridiculous Truck Nutz swinging from the back. It’s a public safety hazard, and I feel like I should be able to file a noise complaint. - 1-Ply Toilet Paper
This is an affront to my delicate posterior and should be deemed un-American. - Crocs with Socks
Are you a fashion icon or just lost your way? Fashion choices like these deserve a thorough review. - Fat-Free Cheese
This is an affront to my taste buds. I’m pretty sure this abomination originated right here in the USA. - Clowns
Let’s just say goodbye to clowns. No further explanation needed. - “Unboxing” Videos
What is the point? My daughter loves watching these but never creates anything. If I’m not getting a cake out of it, it’s pure torture. - White Chocolate
This isn’t real chocolate. Just admit it, folks. It’s a sad alternative. - Dora the Explorer
Has anyone verified her immigration status? And Boots the Monkey? We should be cautious. What’s next, Caillou from Canada? No thanks! - Pineapple on Pizza
Who thought this combination was a good idea? I’m looking at you, Guy Fieri. - Brazilian Waxes
This is just not right. I’m a grown woman, and I’ll keep my hair as it is, thank you very much. - Blister Packs
Why do these exist? I feel like I need a jackhammer just to open a toy. They were clearly designed to exhaust our patience.
There are countless other nuisances like saggy pants, Nickelback, and reality TV stars we could focus on, but the crux of the matter is that we can redirect our collective frustrations towards real threats to our well-being. While we managed to unite against Corinne from The Bachelor, we must remain watchful.
Until we can identify the true dangers lurking in our neighborhoods, we will never achieve safety. For more insights on navigating family planning, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination. And if you are interested in exploring options for at-home insemination, consider checking out this reputable online retailer.
In conclusion, let’s steer our focus away from unfounded fears and address the everyday annoyances that truly impact our lives.