I haven’t enjoyed a full night of sleep in ten years. Let’s be real: since I became a parent, restful nights have been a distant memory. Sure, I occasionally snag a few hours of uninterrupted sleep, but more often than not, I wake up feeling like a creature from the depths—not quite human.
If beauty sleep is a requirement for women, then moms are in serious trouble. At this point, I would settle for just a few hours of sanity-restoring sleep so I can remember which way to put my shirt on before heading to the store in a daze.
Why Are We So Eager for Our Kids to Sleep Through the Night?
Let’s not kid ourselves: kids can ruin a lot of things. Most notably, they can certainly ruin sleep. My children are 10, 8, and 5, and I still wake up astonished on those rare occasions when nobody disturbs me. Honestly, getting a good night’s sleep as a parent feels as unattainable as staying healthy during flu season when your child’s classmates are dropping like flies.
I’ve come to realize that I may have inadvertently created my own sleep-depriving monsters by teaching my kids to call for me instead of getting out of bed. My intention was to avoid unpleasant surprises—like my child proclaiming they feel sick just before their stomach decides to empty its contents in my direction—and to keep my bedroom a sanctuary rather than a kid hangout for every minor discomfort.
The Reality of Sleep Deprivation
Yet, despite all that, we remain hopeful. Our home is equipped with noise machines, fans, and humidifiers to drown out the nighttime disturbances. We sprinkle lavender and wind down with stories, baths, songs, and prayers, all in the name of achieving sleep. But with hope comes the reality of shattered dreams when it comes to actual restful nights.
Most nights, I find myself catching catnaps, and frankly, I thought sleep would improve by now. Instead, I feel like I’m trapped in a sleep deprivation reality show, portraying the overworked, under-rested character who can barely keep their eyes open at a party.
What Sleep Looks Like in Our Household
In our household, sleep looks like kids waking up three times, thrashing around, and moaning so loudly that it echoes through the walls. It’s a race to see what’s wrong only to find out it’s a stuffy nose. Our nights are filled with interruptions from bloody noses, bedwetting incidents, and desperate calls for tissues for boogers that simply cannot be flicked away. And every parent knows that stomach viruses have a knack for striking at night, right?
Nighttime chaos means being woken up by children who can’t get comfortable or suddenly need a different pillow. It’s about kids being too hot or too cold and needing me—finally in a deep sleep—for assistance, or them talking in their sleep so loudly that I can hear it from three rooms away. It’s the dreaded “I heard a weird noise” or “I need a drink” at 1 a.m.
And then there’s the occasional midnight wake-up from my 5-year-old who “needs me.” Really, little one? You can “need me” during daylight hours, but not at 3:28 a.m. on a school night!
Our bedtime ritual seems to include being summoned precisely 25 minutes before my alarm goes off, making it impossible to fall back asleep. Or a child who forgets their alarm is loud enough to rival a jet engine.
Let’s Stop Wishing for What Might Never Happen
So, moms, let’s stop wishing for what might never happen. Sure, that adorable baby will eventually sleep through the night, only to wake up multiple times as they cut teeth or decide to play nighttime mind games with you. I have faith it gets better eventually, or at least I keep telling myself that. Sleep training has shifted from swaddling and teaching self-soothing to convincing them that no monster lurks under the bed if they get up to retrieve their favorite stuffed animal.
Someday, I’ll look back on these days fondly as they enter their teenage years, when getting them out of bed becomes an epic challenge, but I doubt I’ll get much sleep then either. Because, you know, teenagers and curfews.
But hey, sleep is for the weak, right? If that’s the case, then I must be the strongest woman alive.
Additional Resources
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In Summary
Parenting is a wild ride filled with sleepless nights, unexpected interruptions, and the constant search for sanity. But amidst the chaos, we find hope and resilience, even if sleep eludes us.