As solidly middle-class Americans, my husband and I manage to cover our bills and set aside a little each month for fun, savings, or unexpected expenses. But before we had kids, I never anticipated that a significant chunk of our budget would go toward enriching activities for them. Wow, was I in for a surprise!
Over the years, our children have engaged in a variety of extracurricular pursuits such as swim lessons, dance classes, gymnastics, karate, and music lessons. We are grateful to offer these experiences, but man, they certainly come with a hefty price tag.
Costs can vary widely based on location, but some expenses are universally steep. For instance, one of our daughters has been taking violin lessons for years. We’ve invested several thousand dollars annually to nurture her musical talent, hoping it might result in college scholarships down the line. While I cherish her skill and the beauty she brings into the world, the financial commitment is daunting.
With three kids, the cumulative costs of their classes add up quickly. We want them to explore their passions and develop their abilities, but we’re not wealthy. There are many activities we have to decline. I genuinely wonder how families with tighter budgets manage.
So far, our kids have only shown interest in karate when it comes to sports, sparing us from additional costs. However, I’ve heard that team sports can be just as pricey. While recreational leagues might be affordable, elite teams can lead to astronomical expenses. Participating in a competitive sports club can easily reach thousands of dollars annually. For high-demand sports like gymnastics, figure skating, or dance, the costs can soar above $10,000 each year.
If all three of our children pursued competitive sports, it could eat up nearly half of our annual income—definitely not feasible. When I talked to other parents, I discovered that it’s common for families to spend $200 to $300 monthly on extracurricular activities per child. While this may not pose a problem for some, many families simply can’t bear that financial load.
The pressure to provide these opportunities is intense, and it’s not merely about keeping up with others. We all want our kids to have the chance to explore their interests and build valuable life skills through these activities. It’s heartbreaking to say, “I’m sorry, dear. We can’t afford that right now,” especially when they see classmates heading off to dance lessons or cheer camps.
Take dance classes, for example. At first glance, they seem manageable, but then you consider the additional costs like a recital costume—an outfit your child may wear for just five minutes on stage costing around $95. Add in recital tickets at $10 each with only one complimentary ticket, and it quickly escalates to $135 just for your child to perform in front of family.
This is just scratching the surface. One of the most mind-boggling stories I heard was from a mom in the southern U.S. with a daughter in competitive cheerleading. Her expenses included:
- Competition fees: $100/month
- Tuition: $100/month
- Tumbling class: $40/month
- Uniform: $450
- Hair bow: $40 (yes, you read that right)
- Shoes: $35 to $80
- Hotels for competitions: $300 x 9 events annually
- Travel (gas, food, etc.): variable
To top it off, her daughter’s team qualified for a national competition at Disney, which added another $500, plus travel and accommodation costs. All this for one child—who is only 7 years old!
This mom knows how outrageous it sounds, especially the $40 for a hair bow, and she hesitated to share her name for fear of judgment. Yet, many of us can relate to the desire to support our children’s dreams, regardless of the cost.
The real issue lies in the immense societal pressure to provide these enriching activities, which has spiraled out of control. We’ve chosen to stick with local recreational programs and only invest in activities that our kids are genuinely passionate about. Still, I empathize with families who can’t afford these expenses at all. It’s imperative that we change the narrative around children’s enrichment, or at the very least, create pathways for more affordable and accessible options.
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In summary, while we all want our children to thrive and explore their passions, the skyrocketing costs of extracurricular activities can be overwhelming for many families. It’s essential to find a balance that allows for personal growth without breaking the bank.