I adore my children, but like any parent, I find myself venting about them quite often. It’s completely normal for us to express our frustrations — it keeps us sane. I’ll share my thoughts with friends and family, saying things like, “I just want to enjoy a meal without interruptions!” or “Why can’t I have a moment to myself when I go to the bathroom?” or “Why is it impossible to get anything done around here?”
The typical response is, “Oh, I totally understand. You’re not alone. This phase will pass.” But then there are those moments when someone suggests, “You should just let them play. Teach them to entertain themselves!” While I know their intentions are good, my immediate thought is, “You really don’t understand!”
Maybe I’m the one with the issue, or maybe it’s my kids. Who knows? But honestly, my children don’t engage in the self-entertainment that others talk about, unless you count their hours of iPad usage. They do play frequently, but I can’t just let them be; otherwise, my house would be in ruins, and I’d be making unnecessary trips to the ER.
I have two boys, a 4-year-old and a 10-year-old. My youngest can occasionally play on his own for short periods. If I don’t nudge him, and if he’s in the right mood, he might spend 20 or 30 minutes pretending to be a superhero. However, if he’s feeling cranky or his older brother is around, forget about it! I get maybe an hour of solo playtime from him each week — just enough for me to unload the dishwasher. But as soon as I try to sneak in a phone call or hop in the shower, it’s game over; he demands my attention immediately. Yet, if I remain close by while doing chores, I can sometimes get away with it.
My older son, though, has never been one to play by himself. He’s highly intelligent and has a lot of energy, always in search of stimulation. He might dive into a book or a video game, but if he’s not engaged, he’s sure to complain or want to chat with me endlessly.
Both of my boys are quite chatty. It’s never quiet in our house. I’ve grown so accustomed to their constant chatter that when they’re both out of the house, the silence feels surreal. I find myself savoring those peaceful moments, just soaking it all in.
As for them playing together? Oh boy! They love each other, but they require a good deal of supervision. Their playtime usually consists of five minutes of fun followed by five minutes of fighting — it’s a continuous cycle.
I do try to give them space to resolve their conflicts and boredom, but that doesn’t mean I can actually get things done during those moments. It certainly doesn’t guarantee me any peace or quiet.
Maybe my kids need more attention than others, or perhaps I’m overly cautious about what could go wrong, preventing me from allowing them the freedom to navigate their issues. But I suspect they’re just typical kids, and during their early years, most require significant parental involvement, leaving us feeling drained.
I wholeheartedly believe my boys are bright, energetic, and engaged, and they will grow into wonderful individuals. As maddening as they can be right now, I know there will come a day when the house will be quiet, and I might just find myself missing the chaos.
Still, if I’m being honest, I do wish they would occasionally give me some space. I’d love to tackle my daily tasks without feeling like I have two little shadows glued to me.
In the end, I know this phase will pass, and it will all be worth it, but living through it is undeniably challenging. Seriously, can a mom get a moment of peace?
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Summary
Parenting can be overwhelming, especially when kids struggle to entertain themselves. It’s normal to feel frustrated, but remember that this phase is temporary. Finding moments of peace can be a challenge, but with time, things will improve.
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