As my 42nd birthday approaches, I’m feeling that familiar urge to raid the pantry for comfort. But this year, I’m determined to tackle the Birthday Blues head-on. So, this is my moment to reflect on how turning 42 is going to be twice as fabulous as my 21st celebration.
Isn’t it funny how we tend to glorify our younger years as a time of unrestrained joy and freedom? But let’s be real: back then, I was more of a chaotic whirlwind than a carefree spirit. Sure, I thought I had it all figured out.
In my 20s, I was convinced I was invincible. I hiked solo across Europe, worked odd jobs in Australia, and even took on challenges like scaling the Alps and diving into the Red Sea. But deep down, I was scared of so many things.
I fretted over finding my true calling, which led me to try on careers like they were trendy outfits at a boutique. I worried about being single forever, so I clung to all the wrong partners. I feared I wasn’t deserving of love, so I made myself as unlovable as possible. The list goes on: I was terrified of not having enough fun, so I overindulged (and hey, no regrets there!), pretended to be an expert on everything, and avoided admitting when I was wrong.
Now that I’m in my 40s, I don’t view myself as fearless; instead, I fear less. I’ve realized that to truly discover my passions, I need to listen more and talk less—because no matter how loud you shout, you can’t drown out that inner voice. And let me tell you, you shouldn’t even try.
I’ve also learned that you don’t need to be perfect to meet the right person. By embracing my quirks and imperfections, I’ve opened up to the possibility of genuine love.
Being a parent has revealed the boundless love I have for my child, and nothing can change that. Strength, I’ve found, isn’t just about taking on challenges; it’s about how we respond to what life throws our way. My friend Amy faced cancer over Thanksgiving and returned to work without missing a beat, while my dad, despite his physical challenges, lives life with unwavering positivity.
Fun? Well, I’m still working on that. I’ll keep you posted!
At this stage, I’ve gathered enough life experiences to admit that I don’t have all the answers. My kids remind me of that daily. But saying “I don’t know” is liberating—it’s a way to escape the perfection trap.
As a part-time referee for my kids, I often find myself encouraging them to apologize to one another. I’ve come to appreciate how challenging and yet meaningful those words can be, especially when followed by “please forgive me.”
Although I still catch myself yearning for what others have, I’ve learned that God doesn’t just hand us what we want; He provides what we need to grow. Whether it’s joy or hardship, it’s always enough.
And perhaps the most important lesson is this: I am enough. This includes my flaws, my quirks, and yes, even the saggy bits.
Sure, there are still fears that linger, particularly when it comes to my child. I worry about speeding cars in our neighborhood and the lurking dangers of the world. But more than anything, I fear not having enough time with the ones I love—and not using that time wisely.
So as I step into my 42nd year, these are the fears I’ll focus on conquering. Just wait: by the time I hit 84, I might actually have it all figured out!
If you want to dive deeper into the world of home insemination, check out this insightful post on intracervical insemination. For more information on fertility options, Make a Mom provides some excellent resources. And if you’re curious about pregnancy, the World Health Organization has some great information as well.
In short, as I embrace this new chapter, I’m learning to love my journey, flaws and all—because I am enough.