My partner, Sarah, achieved a remarkable milestone last week by graduating from college. Over the past five years, she managed to juggle her education part-time while caring for three children, including welcoming our youngest during her studies. Meanwhile, I balanced two jobs to support our family.
Throughout those challenging years, I often came home late to find Sarah in her comfy sweats, eyes weary from countless late nights spent typing away on her laptop, while our kids snoozed on the couch with a movie playing in the background. College turned her into both a night owl and an early riser. She burned the candle at both ends, often locking herself away for concentrated study time, and finding any spare moment to finish her assignments.
Sarah gave birth to our youngest daughter, Lily, close to the end of the spring semester. I suggested she take a break from her studies, but she was adamant, believing she could manage her coursework despite her scheduled C-section. That term felt like a ticking clock, with the pressure mounting.
Each day, she fought to stay on top of her classes, all while preparing to bring our daughter into the world. She kept her professors informed, and they were supportive, but as the delivery day approached, she found herself slightly behind. In the hospital, while I cradled our sleeping baby, Sarah propped herself up in bed, laptop resting just out of reach of her stitches, balancing the pain of recovery with the determination to engage in her coursework.
Reflecting on my own college days, I remember holding our son in one arm, bouncing him while trying to read a textbook with the other. I thought I was dedicated, but the reality is that I hadn’t just undergone major surgery and faced months of recovery. The level of commitment Sarah displayed after giving birth was truly awe-inspiring.
A month later, she had to ask her professors for an incomplete on her classes to finish them over the summer. I could see the disappointment in her eyes as she made that request, feeling like she had failed. While her request was completely reasonable, she felt that enduring childbirth should not interfere with her education. I helped her draft emails to her professors, and she expressed her hope that they would be understanding. They were, with one even praising her for her resilience and commitment to her studies.
In the following two years, I remember trying to soothe our toddler, Lily, who was in need of a nap. When Sarah returned from class, our little one nestled into her shoulder as if she were a refreshing drink of water. Sarah effortlessly balanced holding her child while working on a term paper with the other hand. Her multitasking skills were nothing short of impressive.
At least once each semester, Sarah would reach her breaking point, often around midterms, and declare she wanted to quit. “I just want to be a mom,” she would say. I’ve always been struck by the notion that “just a mom” implies simplicity. However, being a mother is a complex role that combines countless responsibilities, and Sarah’s ability to manage school alongside that was nothing short of inspiring. She often worried about the time she was dedicating to her education at the expense of our family, and I transformed from a husband into her biggest cheerleader. “You’re doing an amazing job,” I would encourage. “How can I support you?”
In those moments, what she usually needed was help with everyday tasks, like packing a lunch or handling something minor that felt monumental during high-pressure times.
At Sarah’s graduation, our 7-year-old daughter placed the tassel on her cap. While I’m not sure if Lily fully grasped the significance of her mother’s achievement, I plan to show her that photo one day, reminding her of the dedication and hard work that went into earning that diploma.
Motherhood is a journey that transcends individual experiences. According to the Institute for Women’s Policy Research, there were 3.4 million student mothers in 2014. To each of those incredible women, I am in awe of your tenacity. Your commitment to family and future is something truly remarkable. What Sarah accomplished reflects the challenges many of you face. You are champions. You are hardcore.
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Summary
This article highlights the incredible dedication of mothers who pursue their education while managing family responsibilities. It shares the inspiring journey of Sarah, who balanced college and motherhood, illustrating the challenges and triumphs of student mothers everywhere.
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