The moment you become a parent, you’re flooded with excitement for all the “firsts” your child will experience. You count down the days until they roll over on their own, savor the joy of their first taste of rice cereal, and celebrate the thrill of their first tooth. Each milestone is documented and shared—your social media feeds bursting with updates on those precious moments. Baby books become treasure troves filled with dates marking every new achievement. Each first feels like a victory, a sign of growth, and every parent is eager to share and compare notes on how quickly their little ones reach these milestones.
But what about the “lasts”? Do you take note of those fleeting moments? Can you recall the times when your child did something for the final time, marking a bittersweet transition into independence? My father used to tell me that while everyone recalls the firsts, it’s the lasts that often slip through our fingers unnoticed.
As my children enter their teenage years, I find myself reflecting on the many things they used to do that have now faded into memory. There are countless special moments that simply stopped one day, and I can’t pinpoint when exactly those memories became just echoes in my mind.
When was the last time I tiptoed into my son’s room to see him peacefully asleep, a pacifier dangling from his mouth? When did my daughter stop pulling out her beloved footie pajamas and putting them on, inside out and backwards, before bed? I can hardly remember the last time I heard the sound of tiny feet padding across the hardwood floors.
Why can’t I recall the last day I had baby items like butt paste and diapers on my grocery list? When was that final tub bath, where I played and splashed with them, surrounded by bubbles that seemed to capture their innocence? When did I last feel the weight of my infant son curled against my neck, finally succumbing to sleep after fighting it for so long?
On what day did I stop rocking my daughter to sleep in the softly lit nursery I had meticulously prepared for her arrival? When did my little ones transition from crawling to walking, and from speaking in baby babble to complete sentences?
I often wonder about the last bottle I ever offered my son, the moment I packed away the bottles and sippy cups for good. I can’t recall the last epic toddler tantrum he threw before he learned to articulate his needs calmly.
When did my daughter stop falling asleep on the couch after a day full of wonder? I cherish those moments when I would carry her to bed, marveling at how different her slumbering form looked compared to when she was awake.
When did I stop seeing my toddler in the rearview mirror, strapped into his car seat? What day did he start sitting next to me up front, debating music choices and directions? I can’t help but wonder when the last time he’ll sit beside me in the passenger seat before he starts driving himself.
And perhaps what pains my heart the most is when they stopped calling me “Mommy.” When did I become just “Mom”? Those sweet sounds of “Mama” and “Mommy” were always music to my ears, and I wish I could remember the last time they used those names.
While I reflect on these “lasts,” I’m also aware that many firsts lie ahead—first dates, first driver’s permits, and the bittersweet first nights away at college. I’ll cherish those moments too; I just hope I won’t blink and miss them. We’ll take photos of my son with his first car and my daughter at prom. I’ll post nostalgic updates on social media about their milestones, but I’ve learned the importance of being present for the lasts, too.
Because sometimes, saving the best for last can be just as meaningful.
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Summary
Parenthood is a journey filled with memorable firsts and often overlooked lasts. As children grow, it’s essential to recognize and celebrate the ends of certain stages as much as the beginnings. While we eagerly anticipate the future milestones of our children, we must also cherish and reflect on the bittersweet moments that mark their transition to independence.
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