I consider myself somewhat of a “late bloomer.” Raised in a family with conservative values, I often felt quite out of place. I didn’t wear nail polish, play team sports, or hang out with friends on a Friday night. While most kids my age were indulging in Beanie-Weenies, binge-watching Saturday morning cartoons, and mastering Pac-Man, I was experiencing a distinctly different version of childhood. Strict parenting? You could say that was my reality.
I was a vegetarian long before it became trendy, opting for meat substitutes like “Big Franks” and “Stripples.” At restaurants, I was known for ordering hamburgers without meat. It wasn’t until my 20s that I finally tried a real hot dog, and I discovered the joys of pepperoni. Turns out, unclean meat is quite delicious!
In my household, drinking, swearing, and even wearing jewelry were off-limits. I didn’t have pierced ears, and our lives were quite simple. Television was limited, and going to the movies was discouraged, which is why I often find myself clueless about pop culture references from before 2000. I’ve never seen classics like Ferris Bueller’s Day Off or Sixteen Candles. My parents were quite selective about what I could watch and read, believing that everything we consume influences our minds and hearts. Maybe they were onto something, but I still wanted to scream, “Why can’t I watch The Smurfs?”
On days when I feel like shouting “Forget this!” while preparing dinner for my own kids, I think about how I’ve never heard my mother curse. This sets a high bar for me, and I often feel like I fall short (I’m working through my guilt), but it’s reassuring to know that parenting can be done without losing it. My parents demonstrated a healthy relationship in their marriage and parenting, and I didn’t fully grasp how fortunate I was to grow up in a loving, secure environment. Despite their conservative views, they provided me with the freedom to make my own choices. I only realized how unusual my upbringing was as I got older, but it didn’t really matter—I was content.
This sense of freedom allowed me to build resilience and confidence as I explored the woods around our home, armed only with my imagination and our German shepherd. By the age of seven, I was canoeing alone on the lake behind our house, climbing trees, and racing through the woods on my bike. My parents weren’t hovering; they let me breathe. They observed from a distance, allowing me to explore, make mistakes, and learn from the consequences. Shielded from external influences, I cultivated an inner strength that has served me well into adulthood. My viewpoints weren’t shaped by popular opinion, mainly because I had no idea what that was.
When I started dating, my experiences were anything but conventional. Even when I considered marrying someone my parents didn’t approve of, they respected my choices. Ultimately, I decided not to marry that person, but I appreciated their hands-off approach. They understood that effective parenting doesn’t equate to controlling your child; attempts to exert control often backfire. Their thoughtful guidance empowered me with the tools necessary to make sound decisions.
Like many late bloomers, I didn’t master makeup application until well into my adult years, but the important thing is that I did learn. I hope to preserve my own children’s innocence and protect their childhood. There’s no need to rush—well, except for eyebrow plucking; that should have been expedited.
Though my views may differ from my parents’ now that I’m raising kids of my own, I possess the ability to tune out outside opinions and follow what I know is right in my heart. My gut instinct, honed from years of listening to that quiet inner voice, serves me well.
If nothing else, my upbringing taught me that being different isn’t the worst thing that can happen. For more insights on parenting and personal growth, check out this blog post. If you’re considering options for at-home insemination, Make a Mom offers reputable syringe kits. For further information, The Center at UCSF is an excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, while my upbringing was unconventional, it instilled in me a strong sense of independence and the ability to make my own choices. Being different has shaped me, and I wouldn’t trade my experiences for anything.
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