Stop Telling Me Colic Is Just a Phase

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When my partner and I welcomed our first child, we relished those early weeks at home, basking in the joy of parenthood. Armed with countless parenting books, we believed we were ready for anything. We were well-versed in the ins and outs of cloth diapers, homemade baby food, and even the intricacies of car seat safety. A sense of confidence enveloped us, and we were ready to tackle the challenges of parenting head-on.

But then one evening, everything changed. Our newborn son began to cry—not just your typical fussing, but piercing, gasping wails that left his tiny face flushed and his little hands thrashing. Panic set in as we frantically checked for signs of illness or injury, but found nothing. We tried rocking, singing, even taking drives around the neighborhood, but nothing worked. It felt like we were in a nightmare.

What followed was three grueling months of incessant crying—hours upon hours of it—while we battled sleep deprivation. I once heard that infant screams can be used to train Navy SEALS to endure torture. As absurd as that sounds, it felt all too real in our home.

The relentless colic shattered our sense of confidence and disrupted any hopes of a predictable sleep schedule. After reaching out to our pediatrician, I was met with the dismissive assurance that this was simply a “normal” phase known as colic, destined to pass. Normal? Nothing about the sound of my son’s cries felt normal! The nurse chuckled that we would look back on this time with humor once we faced the “real” challenges of parenting. I hung up feeling defeated.

In my desperation, I turned to social media mom groups, joining countless threads in search of solutions. I was bombarded with conflicting advice—some suggested I stop breastfeeding due to lactose intolerance, while others claimed formula would only exacerbate the problem. One mom even recommended an amber necklace she claimed had magical properties to soothe babies. I politely declined that offer, only to find myself more confused than before.

As the colic wore on, my partner and I took shifts pacing the floor, bouncing our son for hours, trying everything from swaddling to essential oils, warm baths, and calming music. It felt like we were trapped in a never-ending cycle of exhaustion and fear, exchanging worried glances as we struggled to comfort our child. The isolation was palpable; no one seemed to acknowledge the toll this was taking on us or that our son was in distress. Instead, it was brushed off as an expected part of parenting, like dealing with picky eaters or the terrible twos. But deep down, I knew my baby was suffering, and I felt utterly powerless.

Eventually—after what felt like an eternity—the colic finally subsided, and our child began to sleep more predictably. Yet, despite the wisdom that parenting is one ongoing adventure with new challenges, I never forgot the profound loneliness that accompanied those harrowing months. Colic is not just a fleeting inconvenience; it’s a memory that stays with you.

Parents facing colic don’t need to hear that it’s merely a phase. When you’re in the thick of it, those words are the least comforting. What they truly need is validation of their struggles and reassurance that they’re not alone in their feelings of helplessness. While I understand now that colic wouldn’t define my son’s future, having just one person who truly understood our plight could have made all the difference.

So, the next time you encounter a parent grappling with colic, resist the urge to downplay their experience with phrases like “it’s just a phase.” Instead, offer support and understanding; that’s what they really need.

If you’re navigating the challenges of colic, remember you’re not alone. You can find more insights in this helpful post on colic experiences here. Also, if you suspect your infant is struggling with excessive crying and tummy discomfort, this resource offers excellent guidance on dealing with home insemination challenges. And for those considering at-home solutions, check out Make A Mom for reputable insemination kits.

In summary, colic is more than just a phase; it’s a profound challenge that many parents face. Understanding, empathy, and support can make all the difference during this trying time.


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