10 Things Only Parents of Little Biters Understand

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We celebrate countless milestones in our children’s lives, but “Baby’s First Bite” (at 2½) isn’t typically one of them. There’s no Pinterest-worthy chalkboard for my son to proudly hold, and no Instagram moments to hashtag. It feels like a burden I must carry alone, a private shame I can’t openly discuss.

My son is a biter.

If your child isn’t a biter, you may not grasp the depth of this struggle. You might shoot me a disapproving look when your sweet child is in tears from my son’s actions. But what you don’t realize is how much that glance stings. It’s like you’re saying, “You’re a terrible parent for allowing this to happen to my child,” and it only amplifies my insecurities about my parenting skills.

You don’t know the sleepless nights I’ve spent worrying that my child will never make friends, that he will always be an outcast. At just 2½ years old, I fear his future is already bleak, and I feel utterly unprepared to guide him through this phase.

Deep down, I know this biting phase is temporary. I understand it’s often just a developmental stage, and with time, he will likely move past it (until he decides to bark like a dog and insists on eating from a bowl). Yet, parenting a little biter brings a unique set of challenges.

Here are 10 things only parents of biters truly understand:

1. Playdates elevate your anxiety levels exponentially. You may appear to be hovering like a helicopter parent, but it’s not merely about safety. You’re on high alert, ready to intervene when your child tries to take a bite out of someone.
2. His wardrobe choices can be problematic. It’s probably best to avoid T-shirts with sharks or humorous images of raccoons wielding weapons that say “I bite.” On other kids, those shirts might be funny, but on a biter? It’s just not a good look. And let’s not even discuss Halloween costumes—zombies and vampires are off-limits.
3. A call from preschool can derail your entire day. They want you to drop everything and come get your little one, and you can’t help but feel like a failure. While you juggle work and the chaos of parenting, the constant calls make you consider quitting your job to pursue a career as a professional puppy trainer instead.
4. Everyone has unsolicited advice, and none of it works. You’ll hear it all, from family to strangers, but nothing seems to change your child’s behavior.
5. You’re convinced your kid will need braces eventually. Just take a look at the evidence—those bite marks on your arm! You even wonder if the orthodontist can use your arm as a mold for future dental work.
6. Your child may not look great in orange. While it’s likely just a phase, you start to worry that your little one has already crossed into “problem child” territory. Friends, family, and even the local grocery clerks may make you feel like you’re destined for a future of police calls instead of playdates.
7. Nursing is definitely over. Ouch, that’s an understatement!
8. You’ve considered some unconventional solutions. How much would it cost to extract all his baby teeth? And how long until the adult ones come in? Would a puppy cone work for toddlers? A quick search shows that such things don’t exist, but it’s worth pondering.
9. You’re becoming a detective. Each incident leaves you gathering clues—what triggered it? Who was present? Are there fewer incidents lately, indicating some hope? You realize that toddlers are not like criminals on TV; their motives are far less predictable.
10. Despite everything, you adore your little monster. You still see the goodness in him and hope others can, too. Someday, this will all be a memory (right? Please tell me there’s an end to this!).

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In summary, parenting a biter can come with a slew of challenges and emotional tolls that only those in the same boat can truly appreciate. But in the midst of the chaos, the love for our little ones remains steadfast.