The 7 Stages of Being Cleared for Postpartum Sex

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When contemplating the journey of motherhood, our minds often dwell on the joys that await. Yes, we anticipate sleepless nights and a few physical changes, but the excitement typically revolves around cuddles, coos, and the overwhelming love we’ll shower on our tiny human. The instinctual desire to breathe in that sweet baby scent is as compelling a factor in pregnancy as romance and biology.

However, as the months pass and our once-tiny embryo transforms into a hefty, squirming baby, the reality of childbirth looms large. The moment of delivery becomes more daunting, with various options that all seem less than pleasant. Yet, we persevere. Our bodies heal (though some things will never be quite the same), and we navigate the early days of motherhood—often feeling lost yet enchanted by these new little beings, despite the frequent diaper changes.

Just when we think we’ve faced the worst, the six-week postpartum checkup arrives, and we hear those fateful words: “You’re cleared for sexual intercourse.” At last!

The optimism behind this statement can be bewildering, as if we’ve simply been waiting for permission to jump back into bed. However, for many women, this transition involves navigating through seven distinct stages:

  1. Shock
    Did the doctor really just say that? Staring in disbelief at the anatomical chart on the wall, you wonder if you’re still dreaming or if you’ve accidentally stepped into an alternate reality.
  2. Denial
    No way. This must be a mix-up. The doctor has confused your file with someone else’s. You’re still grappling with bodily changes—leaky breasts and a belly button that seems to have its own gravitational pull. Nope, not ready for that!
  3. Bargaining
    Desperate to avoid the thought of sex, you start making silent deals. Maybe if you promise to give your partner a little extra attention later, the universe will grant you a temporary medical excuse to avoid intercourse altogether.
  4. Guilt
    On the ride home, you consider lying to your partner about receiving the green light, but guilt washes over you. He’s a good guy and the father of your child—shouldn’t you want to connect with him?
  5. Anger
    But wait—why should you feel pressured? It’s his fault you’re feeling this way! If he would only wake up at night with the baby, maybe you wouldn’t be so keen on escaping into sleep instead of intimacy. Unjustified rage bubbles up, even if he hasn’t even asked about your appointment yet.
  6. Depression
    Back home, you retreat to the bathroom, filled with a sense of isolation (baby in tow, of course). You reminisce about the six weeks of freedom and wish you had savored those quiet moments more.
  7. Acceptance
    Eventually, reality sets in. You once enjoyed sex and can again—this thought begins to spark hope. Plus, you realize your partner likely forgot today was your six-week checkup anyway!

Navigating through these stages is a common experience for many new mothers. If you’re curious about more on related topics, check out this insightful piece here. And if you’re looking for at-home insemination options, you can visit this reputable retailer for syringe kits here. For further resources on pregnancy and home insemination, this site offers invaluable information here.

In summary, the journey back to intimacy after childbirth is rife with emotional ups and downs. But with time and understanding, acceptance can pave the way for renewed connection.


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