6 Ways My Parenting Approach Has Evolved as a Seasoned Mom

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As a mother of two young boys, aged 3 and 8 months, I occasionally find myself taking spontaneous evening outings. While these adventures can be thrilling, they often coincide with the most challenging time of day for my little ones. Just yesterday, while navigating rush hour traffic after a trip to the mall, both boys erupted in cries as soon as they were buckled into their car seats. The volume was impressive—almost comical. I couldn’t help but laugh, and in that moment, I felt a shift within myself.

In the past, I would have been frantically reassuring them, saying things like, “We’ll be home soon!” while reaching back to comfort my youngest. I often tried to drown out the noise by singing loudly, hoping to ease their distress. But yesterday was different. I simply sat in silence, chuckling to myself, devoid of the anxiety that had once characterized my parenting style.

This moment of clarity made me reflect on how my perspective and reactions to motherhood have matured since welcoming my second child. Here are six key changes I’ve embraced:

  1. Less Panic in My Reactions
    When my youngest stirs from a nap, I no longer rush to his side in a state of alarm. I calmly finish my tasks before attending to him, knowing he’s safe.
  2. Comfort with Crying
    I’ve come to understand that crying is a natural part of childhood. I’m now okay with letting my 8-month-old cry a bit to settle down for sleep. I couldn’t have imagined doing this with my first child.
  3. Acceptance of Conflict
    Establishing boundaries has become essential for both my children and my sanity. I used to hesitate to say no, fearing I’d stifle their curiosity. Now, I recognize that regular conflict is normal and signifies that I’m effectively fulfilling my role as a parent.
  4. Relaxing About Perfection
    Previously, I was obsessed with ensuring my little one consumed only the healthiest foods. Now, I prioritize a balanced lifestyle over extremes, whether it’s regarding diet, sunscreen, or bug spray. I’ve learned to apply the essentials and let go of unreasonable standards.
  5. Granting More Independence
    My early days were filled with constant singing and playtime with my baby. Now, I allow my children to explore their own interests and entertain themselves, fostering their independence.
  6. Embracing Support
    With my firstborn, I was hesitant to let others hold him due to fears of germs and support. Now, I willingly hand over my baby to trusted friends and even utilize childcare facilities at gyms, appreciating the breaks I can take. A simple goodbye with a kiss feels much easier now.

In this journey, I’ve realized that my well-being is just as important as my children’s. My love for them isn’t measured by worry but by the joyful moments we share.

As I reached my exit yesterday, even with the traffic halting our progress, I had a moment of doubt. But then, I remembered the stash of crackers in the center console! The presence of those snacks, a testament to my seasoned mom status, restored my faith in my parenting evolution. I tossed some to my youngest without a second thought. The crackers worked wonders, and we made it home with minimal fuss. In the midst of chaos, I found the ability to laugh instead of panic.

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In summary, my journey as a seasoned mom has taught me invaluable lessons about patience, acceptance, and the importance of self-care. Embracing these changes has not only improved my parenting but has also enriched my life.


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