This past weekend, I had a moment of clarity that struck me like a bolt from the blue. As I watched my children lounging on the couch, just being boys, it dawned on me: they are all growing up. This year marks the last time I’ll have a “believer” in my home.
My youngest son is still wrapped in that enchanting innocence—he has a hopeful belief in Santa that is unwavering. How did I not realize that this might be the final year for that? Every morning, he dashes out of bed to find his Elf (who he believes is completely real), and he hands me his letter to Santa, meticulously crafted in a glitter-covered envelope. Yet, in the chaos of my holiday to-do list, I lost sight of his belief.
I suppose this is the plight of the last child. The holiday spirit can get a bit diluted after you’ve done it all before. We’ve celebrated all the first Christmases, captured countless photos with Santa, and eagerly awaited Amazon deliveries filled with train sets and pirate ships. We’ve hosted cookie parties, created matching pajamas, and decorated the tree while discussing Santa’s imminent arrival. By the time the last child comes along, it can feel less magical—more like, “Want to shop for dad? Here’s my Amazon login. Christmas pajamas? There’s a box somewhere, just find it. Picture with Santa? I’ll Photoshop you in. Want to see lights? We have one strand on the tree.”
Shame on me.
This morning on the way to school, I got a reality check. My youngest, deep in thought, said, “I believe in Santa, but I’m not so sure about the reindeer anymore, since they fly.” I froze. This was it—the beginning of the end. I braced for my older son’s response, worried he’d shatter my youngest’s belief. Instead, he replied, “Of course they can fly! Santa feeds them magic food that makes them fly.” My youngest beamed and replied, “Oh yeah, you’re right.”
I exhaled. Despite the pressure of holiday obligations, I’m determined to make this Christmas special for my youngest. I’ll dig out that box of Christmas pajamas and craft a red and green countdown chain. We’ll bake cookies for Santa and discuss magical reindeer food, sleighs that can carry presents for every child, and how elves are working hard at the North Pole right now.
Next year, I might have a child who knows the truth. But for now, we’ll bask in the magic of Santa. For now, we’ll believe.
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