When Marriage Isn’t A Romance Novel

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Row upon row of romance novels filled the shelves in my high school boyfriend’s basement. After school, we’d come in, greet his mother, then sneak downstairs under the pretense of studying, but really, we just wanted to steal kisses. We’d snuggle on the worn velvet couch, enveloped by the smoldering gazes of alluring heroines and adventurous heroes.

His mom, Mrs. Adams, was often lost in one of those novels, flipping through the delicate pages that seemed to crack with every turn. My boyfriend’s parents were high school sweethearts, marrying under a heart-adorned canopy on a sultry summer day in the Midwest. Now, three decades later, their basement housed a treasure trove of well-loved romance stories.

Back then, I couldn’t fathom the allure of reading about love when I could feel it pulsating in my own life. The sweaty palms, fluttering hearts, and delicious ache of new love were mine to experience. Fast forward 15 years of marriage and three kids later, the everyday grind of deadlines, carpools, and bills has largely overshadowed romance. It’s hard to remember that intoxicating feeling of new love where every heartbeat feels like a drum and every love song seems to be written just for you. That thrilling moment when the phone rings and your heart skips a beat, or when you carefully fold a love note into a tiny square to slip into a pocket.

In the early days of our relationship, the chemistry between my husband, Jake, and I was electric, consuming my thoughts and making me crave more. We entered marriage with our hearts soaring, convinced the intensity of our love would never diminish. But time, as it does, altered everything. Love ebbs and flows, sometimes rushing in and other times retreating like a tide. The arrival of each of our daughters deepened my love for Jake, while challenges like miscarriage and work-life balance tested our bond. These experiences forged a more robust love between us, yet I often yearn for the raw, fervent simplicity of our beginning.

Perhaps this is why romance novels hold such appeal. They evoke those exhilarating feelings of first love, the kind where everything seems magical—like love at first sight or overcoming the odds. I’ve dabbled in the Twilight series, which, although aimed at teens, beautifully encapsulates the essence of first love: a young girl meets a mysterious boy, danger looms, and they triumph over it all. It’s Romeo and Juliet, with a supernatural twist.

While the initial kiss kept me eagerly turning pages, my favorite moments were those where restraint held sway. The vampire boy, aware of the danger his desire poses, chooses to hold his beloved close, their hearts beating in sync. Those are the moments that resonate with me. When Jake wraps his arms around me, I close my eyes and listen to his heartbeat, finding solace in his embrace. In those moments, no matter the chaos swirling around us, I recognize what it truly means to love and be loved.

Though the butterflies may have settled, I’ve exchanged the jitters of new love for a profound connection built over years. For those days when I crave the wild passion of romance, I might just head for a well-worn novel. I can’t help but wonder which one Mrs. Adams would recommend. If you’re interested in more about the journey to parenthood, check out this blog post on intracervicalinsemination.org. And for those considering at-home insemination, makeamom.com offers reputable kits to assist you. For more information on pregnancy and home insemination, visit this excellent resource on in vitro fertilisation.

In summary, while marriage may not always mirror the pages of a romance novel, it evolves into a deeper, more meaningful love that transcends those initial thrills.


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