The other day, I found myself uttering a phrase that could only have come from my mother. I never imagined this would happen—especially not at my age.
Back when my sister and I were in our 30s, we would laugh and poke fun at how our mother was slowly morphing into our grandmother. We were so smug, certain it would never happen to us. But as time marched on and we embraced another decade, we silently acknowledged that we were, indeed, growing older. Those pesky gray hairs? They can be easily hidden. That “middle-age spread”? That’s what flowy tops and stretchy jeans are for. We thought we were holding on to our youthful vibe… or so we believed.
Then, one fateful afternoon, following a frustrating clash with my teenager, my mouth opened, and out came my mother’s voice: “If all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you do it too?” Oh my goodness.
The shock on my face was indescribable when I realized what had just happened. How many times had I heard that same line during my own teenage years? I had to call my sister to share my revelation. “Oh, I get it,” she replied. “I’ve caught myself saying Mom’s phrases too.” It was then that we both admitted we had been echoing our mother’s words for far longer than we cared to confess.
Familiar Phrases
- “Don’t make me come in there!”
- “Don’t use that tone with me.”
- “It’s for your own good.”
- “I have eyes in the back of my head.”
- “As long as you live under my roof…”
- “Close the door. Do you live in a barn?”
- “Do as I say, not as I do.”
- “Do you think money grows on trees?”
- “Because I’m the mom.”
- “Because I said so.”
These expressions evolved with our children’s ages. We began with the basics for the little ones, but soon found ourselves diving into the advanced course of Parental Dialogue, swiftly accumulating credits for our inevitable graduation.
That moment when you first hear your mother’s words escaping your lips, instead of the composed, adult version of yourself—that’s your rite of passage. It’s when you realize you’re on a slippery slope, barreling down faster than you could ever have imagined.
During our 20s and 30s, we thought we were immune to this phenomenon. We were fearless, self-assured, and distinct individuals—not mere echoes of our mothers. “I’m giving you until three.” “I’ve had it up to here!” “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
Those nostalgic phrases from yesteryears started surfacing in my mind. And in that moment, it became clear that I had been channeling my mother all along. This transformation didn’t suddenly hit me in my 40s; I had simply dressed her up in different styles to mask an inevitable truth.
“I’ll start treating you like an adult when you act like one.” Well, I suppose I can officially say I am an adult now.
I owe my mother an apology—for all the times we laughed at how she was turning into Grandma Jones. And for the moments I argued back, neglected my chores, and lied about my whereabouts. For all those times I failed to appreciate her and the sacrifices she made for us.
“If I told you once, I told you a thousand times…” Yes, indeed, she probably repeated that a thousand times, just as I have echoed her wisdom to my children.
Glancing in the mirror, I can see her reflection staring back at me. Maybe this aging process isn’t as dreadful as I once thought.
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In summary, recognizing that we’ve become our mothers is a bittersweet revelation that many of us face as we navigate the challenges of parenthood. It’s a journey filled with laughter, nostalgia, and a newfound appreciation for the wisdom passed down through generations.
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