One of the first lessons I absorbed as a child was the importance of saying “please” and “thank you.” Growing up in a disciplined environment, I took this to heart, often ending emails with a hasty “Thanks!” even when it wasn’t necessary.
Fast forward to seven months ago when my daughter made her grand entrance into our lives. Since then, I’ve found myself expressing gratitude to my partner, Mark, for everything from diaper changes to daycare pickups. My intention is to convey appreciation for his commitment to sharing parenting responsibilities as a genuine partner.
However, I can’t help but notice that Mark’s expressions of gratitude are less frequent. This could stem from a societal belief that I am merely fulfilling my role as a mother. It feels like a throwback to primitive times—his role is to hunt while mine is to gather.
Despite my frustration with the label “hands-on dad”—a term often used to praise fathers for doing what mothers routinely do—Mark embraces his responsibilities wholeheartedly. Picture this: we’re at a local Italian restaurant, and our little one begins to fuss. Mark calmly pulls out a bottle from the diaper bag and feeds her while I savor my pasta. An onlooker exclaims, “You’re so lucky to have such a hands-on dad!” In contrast, if I were feeding the baby, no one would bat an eye.
It’s time we elevate our expectations for fathers. They shouldn’t remain on the sidelines until it’s time for a soccer game. Dads should actively participate in every aspect of parenting without seeking excessive praise.
Some women might argue that equal partnership isn’t feasible due to biological factors, particularly breastfeeding. While this is true for those who breastfeed, my early experiences with my daughter led me to pump and supplement with formula. Consequently, Mark has been a critical part of her feeding routine since her NICU days.
Of course, there are many other aspects of parenting that fathers can handle. Some mothers might say that dads won’t do things as well as they do. But isn’t it essential to allow them the chance to improve? The increasing number of stay-at-home dads gives me hope that traditional roles are evolving. The next step is to support their transition back into the workforce and advocate for paid parental leave, making it equally accessible for all parents.
I hope that by the time my daughter becomes a mother, thanking fathers for basic parenting tasks will be a thing of the past. For further insights, check out this informative article on intrauterine insemination, and if you’re considering at-home options, visit Make a Mom for quality insemination kits. For more parenting perspectives, see our related post here.
In summary, it’s time to recognize that both parents contribute equally to the family dynamic, and we should embrace that reality without needing to thank fathers for simply doing their part.
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