If You’re Struggling with a Difficult Mother, Disney’s 'Cruella' Might Hit Close to Home

My family and I were excited to watch Disney’s new live-action film, “Cruella.” The trailer was captivating, promising to reveal the backstory of Cruella, including her infamous laugh, reckless driving, and unique fashion sense. But could she really be so villainous as to pursue those cute Dalmatians for their fur? (I hoped not.)

Watching “Cruella” proved to be more intense than we anticipated. Thankfully, my partner and I viewed it together first, allowing us to gauge its appropriateness for our kids. I say thankfully because, if you have any unresolved issues with your mother, “Cruella” might resonate deeply and evoke strong emotions.

This article contains spoilers, so if you wish to avoid them, consider this your warning. Here we go.

Settling In for Movie Night

On a Saturday evening, my partner and I settled into bed with a giant bowl of popcorn, ready to enjoy some downtime while our kids slept. Yes, we’re adults watching a Disney film on a weekend night—what’s not to love? Disney’s live-action movies are nostalgic for those of us who grew up with classics like “The Little Mermaid,” “The Lion King,” and “Beauty and the Beast.” Discovering the stories behind these characters brings back those joyful memories.

The Story Unfolds

The film starts off on a light note. Estella is a clever, headstrong girl raised by her single mother. We see her sewing, demonstrating her independent spirit despite her mother’s guidance. After being expelled from school for her mischievous behavior, Estella and her mother set off to London for a fresh start, stopping to seek help from a friend. Estella, however, sneaks out during this visit.

In true Disney fashion, the story takes a dark turn. Estella becomes orphaned after a tragic incident involving a balcony. This moment is shocking, even for adults, but it’s not surprising—many Disney tales involve children losing their parents. Estella runs away, believing she is to blame for her mother’s death.

From there, things spiral further downhill. Estella makes friends and they engage in petty theft, using her sewing skills to create clever disguises. As she grows older and lands a job as a fashion designer for The Baroness, Estella thinks she’s finally finding her place in the world. But the truth about The Baroness—a character reminiscent of a current-day narcissist—shatters that illusion.

The Complexity of Mother-Daughter Relationships

Estella’s persona begins to split as she seeks revenge for her mother’s death, oscillating between the roles of a designer and the vengeful Cruella. She engages in elaborate schemes against The Baroness while grappling with her past, leading to moments of self-destruction. The film is rife with themes of abandonment, trauma, and grief, highlighting the complexities of mother-daughter relationships.

Many women I know have complicated relationships with their mothers, often fraught with tension. While some mothers are supportive, others may be emotionally distant, abusive, or neglectful. Just like Estella-Cruella, we can only evade and scheme for so long before our past catches up with us. As the saying goes, “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”

The movie also illustrates that there can be multiple “villains” in a relationship, emphasizing that both parties often have their flaws. We all strive to do our best with what we’ve been given, and sometimes it’s essential to accept the circumstances of others without tolerating toxicity. Establishing healthy boundaries is crucial, and sometimes, distancing oneself—even from a mother—becomes necessary. This can feel like a betrayal, yet it may be essential for our well-being.

Processing Pain and Trauma

While we often hear about daughters with “daddy issues,” we rarely discuss mothers who fail to meet their children’s needs, leaving them to navigate life alone. Estella tries to break free, building a new family with her friends and relying on her talents. Yet, she ultimately finds that the missing maternal connection leaves her shattered.

Motherhood carries immense power and the potential for deep emotional wounds. Many of us walk around with scars that could have been avoided. How do we process that? Some mothers abandon their children, some are emotionally unavailable, and others may have passed away. What do we do with that pain?

Cruella attempts to forge her own path but ends up mirroring her mother’s sinister traits. Instead of embracing a healthier route, she needs guidance to confront her past and channel her energy positively.

Final Thoughts

While “Cruella” is a fictional tale, it vividly portrays the complexities of mother-daughter dynamics and their lasting impact. Before you gather your family for movie night, be aware that Cruella’s journey is filled with trauma and raw truths that may resonate with some viewers.

For more insights on motherhood and self-discovery, check out this post.

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In summary, Disney’s “Cruella” dives deep into the intricate and often painful dynamics of mother-daughter relationships. It serves as a reminder of the lasting effects of trauma, the importance of setting boundaries, and the need to confront one’s past to move forward.

If You’re Struggling with a Difficult Mother, Disney’s ‘Cruella’ Might Hit Close to Home