A Heartfelt Note to Those Who Always Prioritize Others

conception sperm and eggAt home insemination kit

Dear friend, how are you holding up? Feeling worn out? Overwhelmed? Like you’re struggling to stay afloat? If so, know that you’re not alone. I understand your struggle and am here beside you. We’re navigating these turbulent waters together, trying to regain our balance and breathe again. Often, we find ourselves caught in this cycle because we are caregivers, empaths, and people pleasers, always putting our own needs on the back burner. While our kindness is admirable, it can also become a burden. Our lives are filled to the brim, our minds cluttered, and our priorities often misaligned.

I often neglect my own hunger in favor of chores or helping my kids with their homework. Scheduling “me time” feels like a guilty indulgence rather than a necessary break. Most days, I skip showering; even my simplest needs get sidelined. Why? Because, like you, I am incredibly busy. I manage doctor appointments, family schedules, and disputes. I handle cooking, cleaning, budgeting, and juggling responsibilities as a wife, mother, daughter, sibling, friend, and employee—all roles I take very seriously.

I don’t carve out time for myself.

While a bubble bath or a night out sounds lovely, I could manage without them if it weren’t for the emotional toll of neglecting my own needs. Those of us who consistently put ourselves last often overlook our emotional well-being, which is essential for our happiness.

In striving to please others, I frequently avoid conflict or suppress my feelings, believing my opinions aren’t as valuable as those of others. This habit has led me to feel shame and guilt regularly, which is all too familiar. I even stay in unhealthy relationships out of fear of letting go. This cycle is not just problematic; it’s dangerous.

What Can We Do?

So, what can we—empaths, caregivers, and people pleasers—do? How can we prioritize our own needs physically, socially, and emotionally? What shifts need to happen for us to feel valued?

The first step is to change our mindset. While this may seem daunting, especially if you’ve been in this pattern for a long time, it’s crucial. You likely have many responsibilities—your children depend on you, your partner expects your attention, and work demands your time. It’s common to skip lunch and never clock out at 6 p.m.

Establishing boundaries is vital, whether it’s on your own or with the support of a life coach or therapist. Schedule self-care into your day, even if it’s just fifteen minutes to enjoy a cup of coffee, take a walk, or simply breathe. Practice saying “no”—a challenging task for those of us inclined to please others.

I’m not suggesting you adopt a negative mindset or become selfish after being selfless. It’s not about flipping the script to “forget everyone.” I’ve seen that attitude lead to bitterness and emptiness. Instead, it’s about recognizing that you deserve care and attention. It’s perfectly acceptable to prioritize your needs and desires.

Further Reading

For more insights on self-care and related topics, check out this blog post and consider visiting Make a Mom for expert information on home insemination kits. You can also explore UCSF’s Center for excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination.

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In conclusion, it’s essential to remember that you are worthy of care and self-love. It’s time to embrace the idea that your needs matter just as much as anyone else’s.

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