Two months ago, I made the decision to share a personal struggle with my social media audience. After facing several weeks of health challenges, including the removal of my breast implants and a recurrence of breast cancer, I felt it was time to speak out. Following the discovery of a lump, I quickly sought medical attention and was diagnosed with breast cancer for the second time in four years.
I chose to be open about my experience because keeping it to myself felt overwhelming. I believe in using personal hardships to promote awareness and education, hoping to support others facing similar challenges. After announcing my diagnosis, my follower count surged into the thousands. However, this increase came to an abrupt end when I shifted my focus to the essential issue of anti-racism.
Initially, my posts revolved around my surgeries and recovery updates. I continued advocating for self-breast examinations, gaining new followers who shared their own cancer experiences and offered support, including thoughtful gifts and encouraging messages. But when I addressed anti-racism, my follower count began to plummet—first by dozens, then by hundreds. It seemed that while many were eager to offer sympathy and encouragement regarding my cancer journey, discussions around racism made some followers uncomfortable enough to unfollow me.
I’ve received direct messages instructing me on what topics I should or shouldn’t discuss. Some expressed confusion over why I was perceived as “racist against white people,” a notion I clarified is not valid, much like the concepts of colorblindness and reverse racism. They insisted I should stick to health-related topics, failing to recognize that anti-racism is a moral imperative that intersects with all aspects of life. It seems that my cancer journey is far more palatable than addressing the systemic issues my children and others face daily.
When I publicly acknowledged the unfollowing trend, some responded with indifference, stating “good riddance.” Initially, I agreed, thinking negativity should be left behind. However, the reality struck me harder—losing followers due to discussions on race highlights a deeper issue. If people can’t handle a white woman like me advocating for racial equity, they likely aren’t engaging with the voices of BIPOC individuals either. Their discomfort suggests a refusal to confront their own biases, which ultimately perpetuates systemic racism.
It’s troubling to think that those who choose to disengage would rather witness my medical struggles than grapple with the realities faced by marginalized communities. I will not shy away from discussing anti-racism, regardless of my follower count. My presence on social media is not about popularity; it’s about sharing critical information that benefits others. My hope is that people will value the lives and equity of my children as much as they do my health updates.
Ignoring the challenges faced by people of color only serves to reinforce systemic issues. Ignorance is not bliss; it is harmful, particularly to the Black community. Every white person has a responsibility to dismantle the systems that cause harm, rather than opting for distractions. The goal should never be to maintain comfort for white individuals, even if that preference is often evident.
To those who unfollowed me, I acknowledge your choice, but I don’t crave your validation. What weighs heavily on my heart is understanding the reasons behind your departure. I wonder when, if ever, you’ll realize that every life is equally valuable.
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Summary
The author shares their experience of gaining followers through a breast cancer announcement but losing them when discussing anti-racism. They emphasize the importance of having uncomfortable conversations about race and highlight the need for everyone, especially those with privilege, to engage in anti-racism work. The post underscores the value of life and equity for all, regardless of race, and the responsibilities that come with privilege.