As my daughter prepares to start kindergarten, I find myself pondering how to approach the school cafeteria meals. Growing up in the ’90s, I was never allowed to buy school lunches. For one, my mom struggled to find options that wouldn’t trigger my allergies; for another, she deemed the lunches to be both unhealthy and unappetizing.
After checking our district’s lunch menu, it seems little has changed over the years: in one week, the offerings include fried chicken, greasy burgers, and even fried cheese. Chocolate milk is served daily, bordering on dessert territory. However, my concern isn’t just the high levels of salt and sugar, but rather the overall blandness of the meals. I understand the challenges schools face in providing nutritious food on a budget, but if my daughter has the choice between cafeteria cuisine—which I suspect is no tastier than hospital food—shouldn’t I always encourage her to bring a packed lunch?
Surprisingly, I’ve decided against that mindset. The reason? My own childhood experiences with school lunches made them an alluring mystery. The aroma of grilled cheese and tomato soup wafting through the school halls was a weekly torment. There was even a dish called “American Chop Suey,” a mix of macaroni, ground beef, and tomato sauce, that I often reminisce about. My food restrictions made me feel deprived; I remember once indulging in a forbidden box of Twinkies and ending up in the hospital after devouring far too many. It seems I might be the only adult who daydreams about the lunches I missed out on three decades ago.
While I find the school lunches unappealing, that’s just my perspective. My daughter once devoured a questionable burger and soggy fries from a sketchy diner, declaring it the best meal she’d ever had. I want her to develop a discerning palate, but I also recognize that her tastes will evolve over time. Shielding her from certain foods could make them even more enticing.
I’ve been following the guidelines of child nutrition expert Ellyn Satter, who advocates for a “division of responsibility” approach to feeding kids. This means I decide what goes into her packed lunch, while she gets to choose what and how much she eats. However, I fear that completely restricting her from school lunches could backfire, turning them into forbidden delights. Satter suggests occasionally allowing children to enjoy a plate of treats, like Oreos, without restrictions, to help them learn self-regulation.
I believe a similar strategy could work with school lunches. We’ll review the menu together and designate a couple of days each week when she can opt for the cafeteria meal instead of a packed lunch. This approach helps her navigate the myriad food choices she’ll encounter beyond the school walls. After all, life is filled with temptations that may not always be the healthiest or tastiest. I appreciate Satter’s method because it enables children to engage with their culture while learning how to make balanced choices. As they grow, they’ll need to face vending machines, fast food outlets, and subpar hotel breakfasts without it becoming a significant issue.
Who knows? She might discover that school lunches aren’t so bad after all. In fact, schools are now offering healthier options like kale salad and ginger-sesame coleslaw, which is a far cry from the lunches of my youth—though I still miss American Chop Suey.
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Summary
In the end, I’m choosing to let my child experience school lunches rather than avoid them altogether. By allowing her to make choices, I hope to foster a healthy relationship with food while preparing her for the food culture she’ll encounter in the future.
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