My Privilege Sustains My Well-Being

Updated: April 4, 2021

Originally Published: April 4, 2021

Image Credit: Bhupi/Getty

Recently, I experienced a bipolar episode. As the character Quentin Coldwater from “The Magicians” puts it, sometimes my mind just fractures. It began subtly: I found myself arguing excessively on Facebook, which soon escalated to conflicts in real life. A profound sense of impending doom enveloped me, accompanied by crippling anxiety. When the thought of the entire bottle of pills became more appealing than taking just my prescribed dosage, I reached out to my partner and my psychiatrist, pleading for an appointment that very day. Clearly, I was in dire need of mental health support.

My partner engaged me in conversation, pretending he was merely between classes. He continued talking until he arrived at our home. Knowing I would resist if he mentioned he was taking time off work as a public school teacher, he wanted to keep me focused on him rather than those pills. What transpired afterward would have been unthinkable without a significant amount of resources and privilege.

Access to Mental Health Care Is a Privilege

The fact that my partner could even leave work was a testament to our privilege. He has supportive colleagues who are aware of my mental health struggles. They’ve allowed him to step away in the past—like skipping his last free block to accompany me to a psychiatrist’s appointment nearby when I needed it urgently. More than once, they’ve encouraged him to leave early during my breakdowns, understanding that I require mental health support. That’s a significant privilege.

That afternoon, he stayed home with our children while I drove to see my psychiatrist. She is the best in our state, with a background as the former head of the state’s Board of Psychiatry. Given my various overlapping conditions, I require someone with considerable expertise. However, my mental health care comes at a cost. My psychiatrist doesn’t accept insurance; we pay her over $150 for a half-hour session out of pocket.

That’s $150 I hadn’t anticipated needing when I woke up that morning, plus another $10 for new medication. While this may seem minor, we already spend over $100 a month on my psychiatric medications, even with insurance.

The privilege continued. My partner spent several days at home with us. Though he wasn’t penalized for his time off, he had already used his sick leave, which meant his paycheck was considerably smaller. We managed through it because my mental health is critical. I couldn’t have stayed home alone, especially during a pandemic when none of our friends could come to support me.

I had a partner who could leave work, a psychiatrist who could see me immediately, funds for both the appointment and medication, and someone to ensure our kids continued to learn while I focused on my well-being. Additionally, my employers were understanding and did not penalize me when I needed to take a week off without notice. My experience with mental health care exemplifies privilege.

Grateful for Insurance

Thanks to the Affordable Care Act, mental health parity ensures that insurance must offer equal coverage for mental health services, including prescriptions. Some of my medications are more costly, particularly my ADHD medication, which lacks a generic alternative and costs nearly fifty dollars monthly.

However, having insurance itself is a privilege in America. The Kaiser Family Foundation reports that the number of uninsured individuals rose to 28.9 million from 2018 to 2019, not accounting for uninsured seniors, which represents about ten percent of the population. I’m fortunate that my insurance provides decent prescription coverage, and I can only imagine the burden of my mental health expenses without it; most of my medications have just a nine-dollar copay.

My Partner Took Time Off Work

While statistics on how many employers allow time off for a partner’s mental health crisis are scarce, the numbers aren’t high. My partner has a white-collar job, which typically provides the consideration we need. He didn’t face any repercussions for needing time away from work; his employer was supportive.

We managed to cope with the reduction in his income. It wasn’t easy, but we did it. Losing half of our main breadwinner’s paycheck felt significant, and it was an unexpected challenge. However, my mental health care is too essential to overlook.

The Importance of Mental Health Care

Without treatment, my life would be at risk. I could downplay it or avoid stating it plainly, but the reality is stark: I have bipolar disorder, anxiety, depression, and ADHD. Research indicates that 25-50% of individuals with bipolar disorder attempt suicide at least once in their lifetime, with 11% succeeding. Over time, my condition carries a high risk of mortality.

Research shows that low income is a significant risk factor for suicide, but it’s not simply about “poor people are stressed.” Those with lower incomes often have less access to health insurance, quality mental health care, and supportive networks that can take time off when necessary.

I recovered and am back on track. However, the outcome of my breakdown would have been drastically different without my privilege. My privilege not only provides a safety net but also grants access to quality care from the start.

My privilege keeps me alive. Sadly, many others do not have the same luxury.

For more insights on this topic, check out this blog post. If you’re exploring home insemination, Make a Mom is a great resource, and you can also listen to valuable information about IVF and fertility preservation at Cleveland Clinic’s podcast.

Search Queries:

Summary:

This article discusses the author’s experience with a bipolar episode and the critical role that privilege played in accessing mental health care. The author reflects on the financial and emotional support provided by her partner and the accessibility of quality psychiatric care, emphasizing the disparities in mental health resources available to different socio-economic groups. Ultimately, the piece highlights the importance of mental health care and the need for systemic changes to ensure that everyone has access to the support they require.