As an Asian-American parent, I grapple with the complexities surrounding names and identity. Many individuals of color share a similar experience, often facing challenges when it comes to pronunciation or the validity of their names. There’s a painful reality in hearing a pause before someone attempts to say our names, a reminder that we often feel like outsiders.
While I haven’t faced significant issues myself, I made the decision to shield my children from these challenges. Some parents proudly carry their heritage through their children’s names, but I opted for the name privileges that come with my husband’s distinctly German last name. This choice is not just about personal preference; it’s a recognition that unconscious bias exists, and it often favors those with traditionally “white” names. If adopting a German surname can help mitigate some of the discrimination my children may face as multiracial individuals, then I stand by that decision. Their appearance may already mark them as “other,” and I want to give them any advantage I can against systemic biases.
It raises questions: Why is there an expectation that my children should have ethnic names? Why should their looks dictate the appropriateness of their names? Names from diverse backgrounds are just as valid as any other, yet there’s a stigma attached to non-Western names.
Choosing names that may be perceived as “white” doesn’t erase my children’s identities. They are American citizens, and their heritage is something they can embrace fully. They belong to a generation of Asian Americans redefining naming traditions, often combining American names with those reflecting their cultural roots. Many of my friends with East Asian backgrounds choose to give their children both an English name and a name that honors their heritage.
Moreover, let’s not forget that names are not exclusive to one ethnicity. Many common Western names derive from varied historical and cultural backgrounds. It’s amusing to consider how some may claim ownership of names when the roots of most names are intertwined with multiple cultures.
My children have both American and Chinese names, and they seamlessly navigate between the two. They understand both identities and can choose how they want to express them. I never felt the need to give them overtly ethnic names to validate their heritage. However, if they decide to adopt their Chinese names more prominently in the future, I’ll support their choices wholeheartedly.
While some advocate for the idea of making others pronounce difficult names, I also recognize the frustration of having beautiful and meaningful names mispronounced. We’re all navigating a society that often operates on the constraints of bias and preconceived notions about identity. It’s essential to honor both the cultural significance of names and the necessity of adaptability in a diverse world.
At the end of the day, regardless of their names, my children are wholly Asian and American. They are enough, simply by existing.
For more insights on this topic, you can check out this related blog post here. If you’re looking for information on home insemination methods, a trusted resource is Make a Mom. Additionally, Resolve.org offers excellent information on family building options.
Search Queries:
- Why do Asian-American parents choose Western names?
- The significance of names in Asian culture.
- How to navigate identity as a multiracial child.
- The impact of names on bias and discrimination.
- Choosing names for children in multicultural families.
Summary:
The author shares her experience as an Asian-American parent and the complexities of naming children in a multicultural context. She chose traditional names to shield her children from bias while acknowledging their rich heritage. The piece discusses societal perceptions of names, the significance of identity, and how names can reflect multiple cultural backgrounds.