By: Marissa Thompson
Updated: May 13, 2020
Originally Published: Feb. 3, 2017
Shopping has been my most significant indulgence throughout my adult life. Back in college, I could easily spend countless hours—and dollars—on my shopping habits. During a particularly challenging junior year, I racked up thousands on items from stores like Forever 21, Bath & Body Works, and H&M. My collection of trendy clothes and beauty products was so extensive that laundry became a monthly task instead of a weekly chore. Despite the nagging guilt that accompanied my purchases, it never truly deterred me. I would glance at my bank statement each month, but it didn’t hit home until that cringe-worthy moment when my card was declined while dining out with my friend. My account was overdrawn by hundreds, and I felt utterly ashamed.
In a meeting with the bank manager, we devised a plan: to open another credit card with a high limit that was directly linked to my bank account to prevent future overdrafts. For a brief period, I managed to rein in my spending, but soon enough, my reckless habits resurfaced. Even though I was aware of my behavior, the thrill of shopping was too strong to resist.
I didn’t really dive into online shopping until a few years later. Initially, I craved the instant gratification that came from physically walking into a store and leaving with bags in hand. However, as I explored the world of online shopping, I discovered a similar rush. While it lacked the immediate satisfaction of traditional shopping, I found that I could still indulge in retail therapy by browsing through pages of potential purchases. The delivery notifications from UPS or FedEx filled me with excitement as I awaited the arrival of my latest finds.
Online shopping provided a sense of control over my impulses. With endless options at my fingertips, I meticulously compared items—whether it was a sleek dress or a pair of chic jeans. Each item in my cart was a carefully considered choice, matching colors and styles with what I already owned. Watching my cart fill up felt just as gratifying as shopping in-store. “This will be my go-to outfit,” I’d think as I added yet another piece to my collection.
I loved pairing shoes from my closet with dresses I spotted online, envisioning all the events where I could wear them. My shopping habits became compulsive, especially fueled by the desire to avoid shipping costs. The moment my total crept over $50, I experienced a wave of satisfaction that was hard to beat. At my peak, I had memorized my debit card number simply to make the checkout process smoother (yes, I know it’s a bit over the top!).
My online shopping spree didn’t stop at clothes; I also indulged in music and books. I’ve always had a passion for music, and platforms like Amazon became my go-to for expanding my collection, filling the void left by the decline of physical music stores. I could easily locate rare CDs from international artists, satisfying my cravings without leaving home. Shopping for books online was equally liberating; I no longer had to worry about carrying heavy bags home, leading to shipments of new reads arriving at my doorstep.
But the ultimate thrill for me? Snagging a great deal. The rush I feel when I discover a sale at one of my favorite stores is indescribable. When flash sale websites emerged, I eagerly signed up, knowing that they could help me afford the designer items I admired without breaking the bank. I still treasure the unique pair of cowboy boots I bought at a steep discount. However, I eventually had to unsubscribe from numerous store emails to regain control over my spending. Now, I only keep a few subscriptions—mainly for stores where I shop for both myself and my little one. Shopping for him is a bit of a whirlwind; he’s undoubtedly one of the best-dressed toddlers I know, but I often find myself struggling to store all the clothes I buy for him. Letting a coupon expire feels like a personal loss, and I can’t help but feel a sting when it happens.
While I’ve learned to manage my shopping tendencies to some extent, the joy it brings me is rarely matched by anything else. I love those late nights spent in my pajamas, browsing sites like The Children’s Place or Old Navy, searching for the perfect outfit for my son or a new pair of cozy leggings for myself. The exhilaration of receiving shipping notifications still makes my day, and even though I’ve developed the discipline to wait for a good sale, I’m not sure I could ever quit this guilty pleasure entirely.
With increased financial responsibilities—especially being a mom—I’ve faced my shopping habits nearly leading me to financial ruin on more than one occasion. It has even been a source of tension in past relationships. Oops.
I know I’m not alone in admitting that shopping is my one true vice. I’ve realized that moderation is key, and when I keep my budget in check, I find even greater enjoyment in my purchases. Unless, of course, there’s an irresistible sale…
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In summary, online shopping is a double-edged sword for me. While it offers joy and fulfillment, it also requires careful management to avoid financial pitfalls. Learning to enjoy shopping in moderation has made it a more rewarding experience.