My child has been throwing up all day, and neither of us got any sleep last night. Now he has a fever of 103, even after taking fever-reducing medication. What should I do?
No, I’m not seeking advice. I’m simply sharing a common scenario I’ve encountered in parenting forums online. There are countless other posts just like it—moms sharing similar distressing situations daily. Some parents even upload videos showcasing their child’s irregular breathing, alarming rashes, or persistent coughing fits.
As a mother of four, I want to have an honest talk with you. If you’re considering seeking a diagnosis for your child’s health issue online, pause and think again. Instead of seeking opinions from strangers, take a different route—one that is far more sensible.
If your child is unwell, take them to a healthcare professional. It really is that straightforward.
I understand that a late-night trip to the emergency room can be daunting. I know that spending a Saturday morning at urgent care, surrounded by other sick individuals, isn’t the most appealing option. I can empathize with parents cradling their sick children as they wait at the pediatrician’s office—everyone feels miserable.
Caring for a sick child is undeniably tough. It impacts not only them but also the entire family. You might worry about the illness being contagious. Should you spend time sanitizing every surface, or is it better to snuggle your little one? How can you grab over-the-counter medications or comforting snacks when you’re stuck at home? Why didn’t you stock up on cough drops during your last shopping trip?
I completely understand your frustrations. However, let’s be real. The folks in your online mommy group—even if some claim to be healthcare professionals—aren’t equipped to properly evaluate your child or provide a reliable diagnosis. You might be interacting with anyone about something incredibly important: your child’s health.
As a mom of four, I feel a pang of anxiety every time I see a post about a child’s vomiting, accompanied by a timeline of how many times they’ve been sick in only a couple of hours, followed by a mom asking, “How much blood is too much?” Your child’s illness could be a seasonal bug, like a tummy virus, hand-foot-and-mouth disease, or a cold. This time of year is notorious for spreading germs, right? I genuinely hope your child’s illness can be remedied with some ginger ale, chicken soup, tissues, binge-watching their favorite shows, and some pain relief.
But what if it’s something more serious? What if the irregular breathing indicates a respiratory virus or pneumonia? What if your teen’s fatigue and excessive thirst signal the onset of type 1 diabetes? Or what if your preschooler’s unusual rash and vomiting point to strep throat requiring antibiotics? What if your seven-year-old’s rising fever is the beginning of influenza?
I don’t mean to alarm you. But it’s vital to understand that the best person to assess and treat your child is a qualified physician—not the parents in the middle of their own sleepless nights, whom you may never meet again. Seek out the professional with a medical degree and the authority to prescribe treatment. Don’t get sidetracked by local moms trying to sell you essential oils when you’re at your most exhausted.
Every time I read through responses to a parent seeking help for their sick child, I feel like I’ve entered an alternate reality. Much of the advice offered is downright absurd, and I sincerely hope the parent doesn’t follow it.
For instance, a child with an unexplained rash shouldn’t be subjected to an ice bath just because an older mom swears by it. A child with a fever of 104 won’t be magically cured by a green smoothie promoted by a multi-level marketer. And a tween suffering from a prolonged migraine isn’t going to bounce back after applying breast milk to her forehead.
I appreciate the value of healthy eating, fresh air, probiotics, and alternative treatments when appropriate. But how can you treat an illness effectively without a proper diagnosis?
It sounds unbelievable, but anyone familiar with online parenting groups knows I’m being truthful. Then there are those of us—the practical, seasoned parents—who simply respond with “Take your child to the doctor ASAP.”
I’m not suggesting that every cough, rash, or bout of diarrhea necessitates a pediatrician visit. Of course not. But if your child has a high fever, is unable to keep food down, appears lethargic, has an unexplained rash, or is having trouble walking, gather them up and head to the doctor. Don’t waste precious time capturing photos or videos to share in your favorite parenting group.
Focus your energy on caring for your child. Be the responsible adult who takes their child to a medical expert. There will be plenty of time later to chat with other moms while snuggling with your recovering little one on the couch.
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In summary, when your child is unwell, seek professional help rather than relying on advice from social media. Your child’s health deserves the attention of a qualified doctor, not the opinions of anonymous online users.