Who doesn’t appreciate a good massage? It’s a wonderful treat to unwind and indulge in some self-care while enjoying soothing aromas, as the tension in your muscles melts away. Many of us don’t indulge in this luxury often enough, but when we do, it feels like pure bliss—like a warm pat of butter sliding down a stack of pancakes.
I’ve had my fair share of massages and, I confess, I love them so much that I even pay my children to rub my feet to tide me over between professional treatments. They appreciate the pocket money, and it genuinely helps ease my stress, even if it’s just a brief five-minute session.
I think most people can relate. It’s rare to meet someone who would turn down a relaxing massage, whether it’s from a spa professional or a partner. However, I was completely taken aback recently when I discovered that some people are actually paying around $80 to have large snakes slither over their backs and faces at spas.
Supposedly, this unique experience is quite “soothing” and “stress-relieving.” Yet, I can’t help but wonder how many drinks I’d need to consume before I’d feel comfortable with reptiles crawling all over me. In my mind, this sounds more like a punishment than relaxation, adding to my already high stress levels.
The snakes involved in this unusual treatment are non-venomous types, such as the California king snake, corn snake, and milk snake. Some facilities even let a python glide along your spine—don’t worry, they tape its mouth shut for safety. You can have these cold-blooded creatures traverse your back, neck, shoulders, or even your face. Who wouldn’t want a snake’s tongue poking around their nostrils?
If you’ve ever wanted to face your worst fears, this might be the experience for you. Personally, at almost 44 years old, I still check the toilet bowl for lurking snakes every time I wake up in the night—so I struggle to see the appeal of this treatment.
On the flip side, advocates argue that the weight of the snakes creates a kneading effect that can be quite pleasurable. Can you see the benefits now? Not me.
I’m still not convinced in the slightest. I’d much rather have someone use a bread machine paddle on my back or perhaps a handheld mixer to work out my tension. Give me an electrical appliance that won’t slither around my neck or ears any day of the week.
And what about sensitive areas? Snakes are known for seeking warmth, often basking on rocks to soak up the sun. I can’t risk having a snake cozy up in places it shouldn’t be.
It’s hard to believe anyone would recommend lying on a table while a snake roams free across their body as a way to relax. This feels more like a contest to find the most absurd relaxation method, and if that’s the case, I’d gladly award the trophy to this bizarre trend. I’d take some lavender oil on my shoulders and the gentle sounds of Kenny G over this any day. Even if a celebrity like Jason Momoa showed up at my door offering to pamper me for life, I still wouldn’t choose a snake massage.
After considering all the questions this concept raises, I’m left with a tension headache that only a traditional massage can cure—minus the snakes, please.
For more insights on alternative methods, you can check out this article from our other blog. If you’re interested in home insemination, Make A Mom provides an excellent resource. Additionally, UCSF is a fantastic place to learn more about pregnancy and related topics.
In summary, while the idea of a snake massage might intrigue some, it’s not for everyone. Many would prefer traditional methods of relaxation that don’t involve cold-blooded creatures.