As summer approaches, the excitement typically felt by families shifts into a mix of anticipation and apprehension. For many parents, the end of the school year signifies a welcome break, but for children with anxiety, the unstructured days ahead can induce significant stress. My 15-year-old, Mia, eagerly looks forward to late mornings and carefree days, while my 13-year-old, Jake, is excited about his month-long adventure at sleepaway camp. In contrast, my youngest, Lily, who is nearly 7, views summer as a daunting prospect.
For Lily, the absence of a daily routine and the unpredictability of spontaneous plans feel overwhelming rather than liberating. The thought of having no structure sends her mind racing with anxiety, which often manifests physically. Last summer, she experienced severe hives that persisted for weeks, a clear indication of her struggle with the transition from the structured environment of school to the more flexible nature of summer activities.
While many kids relish the freedom summer brings, those with anxiety may find themselves dreading the changes that accompany this season, despite its potential for joy. They crave the same outdoor play and creative time as their peers, yet the leap from familiarity to the unknown can be particularly challenging for them. This transition can encompass anything from new camps to travel plans, each element adding to their sense of discomfort.
As the school year draws to a close, I notice Lily’s anxiety ramping up. She bombards me with questions: Will she sleep in too late? What time is our flight? Will she remember to pack her beloved swim goggles? What if she loses her favorite stuffed animal? These inquiries stem from a place of anxiety rather than mere curiosity; she often envisions the worst possible outcomes, leading to an exhausting cycle of worry.
Managing her anxiety is a delicate balance. Each concern must be addressed thoughtfully—sometimes taking mere minutes, other times stretching into lengthy conversations. Recently, after picking her up from art class, she broke down, worried that a specific shade of pink pom-pom might be gone when she needed it for a project. This incident occurred during the school year, a time characterized by routine and predictability. It’s hard to imagine the intensity of her feelings when the structure of summer arrives, bringing with it an array of new experiences.
To ease her transition, I limit the number of changes in her summer schedule. She attends the same day camp for several weeks, surrounded by familiar faces. We review the weekly agenda together beforehand, providing her with a sense of control. Travel poses additional challenges; this summer, we have two trips planned, each requiring extensive preparation to help her anticipate what’s ahead.
It pains me to see my bright, sensitive daughter struggle during a time that’s meant to be carefree. I want her to experience the simple joys of summer: to relish the taste of popsicles on a hot day or to frolic in the sprinkler without concern. While I cannot erase her fears, I strive to create a safe space for her feelings. My hope is that she will gradually learn to manage her anxiety, allowing her to embrace the freedom that summer should offer—complete with messy mud pies and laughter.
In the meantime, I will continue to encourage Lily to take small steps outside of her comfort zone, fostering experiences that align more closely with the essence of summer.
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Summary:
This article discusses the challenges children with anxiety face during the unstructured summer months. While many children look forward to summer freedoms, anxious kids like Lily may struggle with the unpredictability it brings. The author shares personal experiences and strategies for easing the transition, emphasizing the importance of structure and communication in helping anxious children navigate their feelings.