I’ve never been one to seek out new experiences. My comfort zone consists of well-worn bed sheets, a trusty travel mug that fits perfectly in my car, and a pizza place that doesn’t need to ask for my order—it just knows. For me, the familiar is a source of solace. As a child, I had a phase where only one specific pair of brown corduroys would suffice.
While friends and family jokingly labeled my preferences as obsessive, it wasn’t until I became a parent that I recognized how my aversion to the new could hinder my daughter, Lily, who began to mirror my reluctance. I found myself in uncharted waters when she started rejecting various foods, moving from all things orange to anything squishy, and ultimately, smelly items. Our meals began to revolve around apple sauce squeeze pouches and French fries, prompting me to recite the age-old parent mantra, “You’ll never know until you try it.” But my words fell flat, as I couldn’t genuinely sell the notion of trying something new.
When Lily opted for the same books and outfits day after day, I’d ask her if she wasn’t bored yet, to which she confidently replied that she wasn’t. I could relate—I, too, have my Netflix favorites that I watch repeatedly instead of risking it on a new series. Both of us prefer the comfort of the known.
However, embracing change is essential for growth. It’s the reason we need seasons, sales, and the ebb and flow of tides. If I wanted Lily to develop into a woman capable of meaningful relationships and learning from setbacks, I realized I needed to step out of my own comfort zone alongside her. Thus, we established three guiding principles to explore new experiences together.
1. You don’t have to love it.
Not every new experience needs to be extraordinary; it can simply be passable. The fear of disappointment often discourages me from trying something new. So, I took a deep breath, ordered a different drink at the café, and encouraged Lily to pick a new book at the library. While neither was better than our usual favorites, our goal was to broaden our horizons—and we succeeded.
2. You don’t have to be the best.
I’m currently learning the value of being a beginner. In the past, I would only pursue activities I was confident I could excel at. Yet, there’s a certain charm in exploring new interests without the pressure to perfect them. I began following a new cooking blog and trying out various recipes, inviting Lily to be my taste-tester. She also agreed to finally ride her new bike, which had been gathering dust since Christmas.
3. Give it at least three tries.
My initial attempts at making gazpacho were disastrous—two inedible attempts that looked like a green smoothie gone wrong. But on the third try, I finally produced something palatable. Similarly, Lily was frustrated with her bike after a minor tumble but agreed to give it three more attempts before deciding whether to quit. Sometimes, the challenge lies not in the activity itself but in overcoming the initial unfamiliarity. This approach allowed Lily to form a more objective opinion based on experience rather than emotion.
It has been an enlightening journey, exploring new experiences in order to inspire my daughter to do the same. I’m not certain I would have ventured into this territory if it weren’t for her. Children often push us to evolve for our mutual benefit.
Looking ahead, we have more adventures planned. Lily is excited to try soccer this fall, and I’ve enrolled in a cooking class. Bit by bit, the act of welcoming new experiences is becoming more familiar to me.
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Summary:
Encouraging my daughter Lily to embrace new experiences has prompted me to confront my own reluctance to change. Together, we established guiding principles to explore the unfamiliar, from experimenting with new foods to trying out new activities. This journey has not only expanded our horizons but has also strengthened our bond as we navigate the challenges of growth together.