Like many families, our home is adorned with framed photographs, each capturing cherished moments. Most of them are simply referred to by their context, like “the trip to the beach,” but there’s one that stands out with a title: “The Boys, They Don’t Have a Mom!” Our eldest son chose this name, a fitting tribute as he is one-half of the duo depicted in the image.
When we lived in a vibrant neighborhood in Phoenix, I took our sons, then just 4 years old and 18 months, to a photography studio in Scottsdale’s upscale Fashion Square Mall. What was supposed to be a fun outing quickly turned into a total fiasco, involving every possible mishap and depletion of my patience. Yet, despite the chaos, we managed to get that treasured photo.
Later that evening, while you were still at work and the girls were doing their homework, I found myself on the floor, surrounded by the boys as they played with their trains. Suddenly, James exclaimed, “You see these boys?” He was holding the framed photo, struggling to manage its size. With his little finger jabbing at the picture, he repeated, “You see these boys? They don’t have a mom!”
My heart sank. How could he think they were motherless, especially after the crazy day we had? I used to pride myself on my composure as a parent, but in that moment, it felt devastating. I was a seasoned mom, no longer the frantic rookie I once was.
“Those boys do have a mom! A fantastic one!” I retorted. When you came home, we shared a laugh as we pieced together his innocent misunderstanding. It turned out that my constant presence had led to his confusion; I was there but not visible in the snapshot. He was grappling with the concept of presence and absence, much like we are now without you.
Last night, as our youngest dressed for prom, we faced a familiar challenge: none of us knew how to tie a tie. You had always taken charge of that task, and with you gone, we felt your absence acutely. We planned to ask another dad for help, but that didn’t work out. Instead, your daughter called her boyfriend for a FaceTime tutorial, and in the end, we managed to pull it off, but we missed your guidance. I can almost hear your playful pre-prom routine where you’d demonstrate the tie technique while joking about consequences for misbehavior.
This morning, as I rolled over to the empty side of the bed, my gaze fell on the photograph, “The Boys.” I was reminded of how present I had been that day, much like you were in our children’s lives. Our favorite parenting scripture, Deuteronomy 11:19, talks about teaching kids throughout daily life—“when you rise up, when you walk along the way, when you lie down.” You embodied this principle; the boys absorbed your wisdom and lessons, even if you’ve stepped out of the frame.
While we navigate life without you, they can always find guidance in your words and watch a YouTube tutorial for everything else they need. For more insights on parenting and home insemination, check out this link, and for authoritative information on home insemination, visit this page. Additionally, this resource offers excellent information on pregnancy and fertility.
In summary, as we face milestones without you, your memories and teachings continue to guide us, reminding us that though you may be gone, your presence remains in our hearts.