You’ve seen the commercials—the ones for diapers, cleaning products, and even coffee, where the parents wake up to a perfectly tidy home. Everything is in its proper place, and the babies are always laughing and cheerful, never having tantrums or causing chaos. I bet those little ones sleep through the night, leaving their parents feeling rejuvenated and ready to tackle the day.
Most of those babies are around one year old, which makes me chuckle. I’d love to create a commercial that captures the true essence of parenting a one-year-old, or perhaps even my own workout video to show just how much energy it requires. So, what does a typical day look like when you’re just trying to survive this stage of parenthood? Let’s dive into the reality:
Is she choking? Wait, she’s pulling out the outlet cover—oh no, it’s in her mouth! Pull it out, pull it out! Is she climbing up something? Sweetheart, get down from there! Is she near the toilet? Oh, she’s playing in the toilet? WHAT?! Did she just put that random object in her mouth? Honey, let Mommy see!
Roll down the window; she’s going to be sick again. Give Mommy the remote. No, don’t push that…too late! What’s wrong, sweetheart? You want up? Alright, now you want down? No, back up again? You can’t keep bucking to get down!
Is she heading for the stairs? Who took down the baby gate? Oh no, please don’t—okay, just let Mommy clean that up. Did she swallow that penny? Oh my gosh, I think she did! Time for another outfit; she had a blowout. There’s none in her drawer? Did you check the dryer?
Where’s the skillet? And my mixing bowl? Let me peek in her play yard—she loves to stash stuff in there. Don’t pull the dog’s tail, and definitely don’t ride her!
Come here, let Mommy wipe your nose. Just…let…me…wipe. Don’t give her that; she doesn’t have enough teeth to chew it! Wait, where is she? Why can’t I find her? Oh no, she’s trying to stick her finger in the outlet again—didn’t I put that protector back?
Honey, please don’t bang on the keyboard. I need another outfit; she pulled her bib off and juice is everywhere. Don’t eat that dirty shoe, sweetheart! Here, give Mommy the shoe.
Anyone see where all the sippy cups went? I should check the van; I think I spotted a few there yesterday. Where did I put the dustpan? And the broom? Wait—why are you chewing on the dirty broom?
Careful near the edge! Oh no, she fell—someone get me the ice pack! The baby lost her shoe again; why do we even buy her shoes? What is that? Don’t eat that Fruit Loop. We haven’t bought those in months; did she fish that out from under the couch?
What’s wrong? Daddy’s just hugging me…don’t cry! Honey, it’s okay; Daddy can hug Mommy too. Get your mouth off that; it’s dirty. Ugh, germs everywhere—she’ll have a fever by morning.
Where’s the remote? Someone, please, get the baby the remote. Can I have my phone back? Oh great, locked out for the next 14 minutes. Who took the baby gate down? Seriously?
Get down from there! You’re going to fall! The blanket—pull it away from her face. The binky fell? It’s fine, let me just lick it…good as new!
I really need to grab the vacuum. Which room did I leave it in? Honey, stop bucking on the floor; you’re going to hurt yourself. The fan is hot—don’t touch it!
Who deleted Bubble Guppies? Seriously? Is one coming on soon? Sit still so I can buckle you in. Please, sweetie, just stay still. Don’t slam the door; watch your fingers!
How did you get that? Danger! Put that back! That’s Mommy’s cleaning supplies! Oh, you broke the baby lock.
Sweetheart, get out of the cupboard. Don’t throw that—too late, you already did. Baby, go back to sleep. Do you want to go night-night? Let’s sleep now. Mommy loves you; stay in your crib.
Okay, one more kiss and snuggle. I’ll see you in the morning. Here’s your binky. Goodnight, honey. Lie down—you’re so tired. Just lay your head down.
Here’s your binky. Shhh, let me rub your head. It’s late. Go night-night.
Alright, you win. Just come into our bed…where I’ll get kicked, hit, and flailed upon, leaving me with hardly any consecutive rest.
Now, I’d love to see a diaper or coffee commercial that reflects this reality. Yes, being a parent to a one-year-old is genuinely draining. I’m seriously considering hiring a camera crew to film a commercial that captures the truth.
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Summary
Parenting a one-year-old is a whirlwind of chaos, worry, and exhaustion. From constant vigilance to managing messes and keeping little ones safe, the experience is far from the idyllic images portrayed in commercials. Yet amidst the challenges, parents continue to navigate this demanding yet rewarding journey.