I Was Raised by a Resilient Single Mother, and Here’s What I Learned

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Growing up, my mother was the type of parent who saved everything—from every handmade holiday card to every little drawing I created as a child. It wasn’t until I got married that I discovered the massive trunk filled with these cherished memories, a treasure trove from various moments in my life. Among the items was a drawing I made in 1990, when I was just six years old. It was titled “Ava’s Future Family” and depicted a mother, four children, a dog, and two horses. What was notably missing? A father figure.

At that time, school counselors were concerned about the absence of a dad in my drawings, worrying it signified an emotional struggle stemming from my parents’ divorce. Ironically, the reality was far from their assumptions. I didn’t include a husband in my future vision for the same reason I didn’t draw in a whale or a cat—I simply didn’t think I needed one.

Now, as a mother myself, I have a wonderful husband who is my partner in life. However, I’m also confident that if I ever had to navigate life alone, I could manage. I inherited much more from my resilient single mother than what could ever fit into that heavy trunk. The lessons she taught me are invaluable.

Money Matters, Even If It Doesn’t Buy Happiness

It’s often said that the best things in life are free, but let’s be honest—shelter and food are essential, and they require money. Growing up, financial strain was a constant in our household. My mother bore the weight of that pressure alone, and I learned from her that while money may not equate to happiness, it is crucial. This understanding has driven me to work hard to ensure I can provide for my children independently if needed. For more insights on navigating finances, check out this helpful resource.

Gender Roles Are Outdated

I’m grateful for my husband’s support at home, especially when it comes to tasks I struggle with, like opening stubborn jars. But my mother didn’t have the luxury of a partner to help her. She tackled home repairs, mowed the lawn, and took care of our family with sheer determination. She was a living testament to breaking societal gender norms, and I strive to embody her spirit in my own parenting.

Parenting Demands Sacrifice

There’s no denying that parenting can be incredibly challenging. My husband and I often feel overwhelmed, and we’re a two-parent household. My mother did it all on her own, sacrificing so much to create a loving environment for us. The level of commitment she demonstrated is awe-inspiring and deserves all the recognition—without any of the stigma that often accompanies single motherhood.

I Am Enough

I can only imagine the fear my mother felt when she realized she had to raise three children by herself. Yet, she embraced the challenge without hesitation. Watching her juggle a full-time job, complete her education, and provide for us taught me that I could also be enough for my own children if the situation ever arose. Although we faced financial struggles, the bond we shared made those challenges bearable.

My mother’s teachings shaped who I am today, and I will always hold them dear. To read more about the journey of motherhood, check out this insightful article.

In summary, my upbringing by a strong single mother instilled in me essential values about resilience, the importance of financial stability, the irrelevance of traditional gender roles, the sacrifices required in parenting, and the belief that I am enough. These lessons remain invaluable as I navigate my own path as a mother.

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