I’ve shared bits and pieces of my parenting journey with you over the years, from the toddler phase when my daughter cut her hair repeatedly, no matter how well I hid the scissors, to the tween years when she insisted on wearing shorts even in frigid winter weather. Then came the teenage years filled with dramatic eye rolls and teenage angst, and now here we are in the “I have an adult child” phase.
I find myself reflecting on my past behavior, and I owe you an apology. I’m truly sorry for every snarky comment I made, convinced I was a master of adulting after just a few minutes of independence. I remember using that infuriating sing-song voice that parents often adopt, thinking it would instill wisdom.
Leaving my daughter at college was heart-wrenching. I cried for what felt like hours while she walked away, confident and ready for this new chapter. I’m so proud of her, yet now it feels like she’s too busy to even take my calls. I understand she’s trying to navigate adulthood, but it’s frustrating when she totally misses my attempts to connect, especially when I see her posting on social media at the same time.
Deep breath. I still don’t know how you managed to put up with my teenage antics. I’m grateful you did. You always told me, “This too shall pass.” But when does it pass? Will I ever enjoy living with my daughter again? Right now, it seems unlikely, despite my overwhelming love for her. I’m considering wearing a t-shirt that proudly states how amazing she is, just to remind myself daily.
I’m already preparing myself for the inevitable criticism from the parenting community for speaking candidly about my struggles. But honestly, I’m just trying to navigate this complicated relationship through a grown-up lens. I remember yearning for independence and thinking I had all the answers, just like she does now.
I knew there would be distance when she left for college, but I didn’t anticipate how challenging it would be. Neither of us seems quite ready for this new chapter. Her father and I aren’t finished parenting, but she believes we should be. It’s a strange limbo we’re both stuck in, muddling through and making mistakes along the way.
Despite the ups and downs, I know our ultimate goal is to make it through this phase as a family. We love each other fiercely, even if it doesn’t always feel that way. Today, I might let a few of her texts slide and focus on reaching out to you instead.
Love,
Your Daughter
P.S. I truly appreciated that car you gifted me, and I still do.
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Summary
In this heartfelt letter, a mother reflects on her journey of parenting her daughter through various stages of life. She expresses her love and frustrations as she navigates the complexities of her daughter’s transition into adulthood. The letter touches on themes of nostalgia, apology, and the challenges of maintaining a strong bond as children grow.