By: Jamie Taylor
Updated: Oct. 5, 2017
Originally Published: Oct. 3, 2017
Photo by: Erin Steele / EyeEm / Getty Images
I’m the type of person who can’t resist turning birthdays into a week-long celebration. My late aunt was notorious for her extravagant birthday antics, and they’ve become a cherished ritual for me. So, reaching milestone birthdays has never fazed me. I didn’t lose sleep (aside from the usual chaos of life), nor did I wallow in nostalgia over my “glory days.” It’s just been part of my life’s journey.
However, the past couple of months have thrown me for a loop. My family has sold our house, downsized to a camper, changed jobs, relocated, unenrolled our child from school, and embraced homeschooling—all starting right after my husband hit 34. This whirlwind has made me acutely aware that I’m nearing the big 3-6. Yes, I’m the oldest in our family—defying all stereotypes and traditions.
How did this happen? I still feel like a teenager, obsessing over what time we should leave for Friday night games. How did I become just like those moms at the mall whose jeans shape their bodies into strange forms, sporting haircuts that defy reason? This can’t be my reality, yet I catch a glimpse of myself in store windows, and it’s undeniably me.
Here’s why aging isn’t as glamorous as my younger self envisioned:
- My Skin is Out of Control.
In my teens, I had a flawless complexion, but now, as I approach my mid-30s, my skin seems to be staging a rebellion. I’m battling more hormonal acne than a 90s skin care commercial, and I’m suddenly noticing moles and freckles I never had before. My weekends are now filled with wine and frantic searches for remedies to these new skin woes, often leading me to WebMD, where I inevitably convince myself that I’m gravely ill. Makeup isn’t my forte either, and I have no desire to look like those celebrities who have opted for extreme cosmetic procedures. I often wonder how long it will be until my hands start to resemble my grandma’s. - Dressing Myself is a Challenge.
If it were up to me, I’d live in yoga pants and hoodies. It’s laughable to even call them “yoga” pants, given that they’ve only seen grocery stores and my couch. I feel too old for rhinestone-studded jeans or sweatpants emblazoned with “JUICY.” Yet, shopping at stores like Belk is like stepping into a retirement home. I thought LuLaRoe might save me until I realized their leggings do nothing for my body. So, what’s the solution? Dress how I feel or accept that the youthful version of me has vanished? - What Defines Success?
Approaching 40, I see friends either well on their career paths or hanging onto dead-end jobs, and I sometimes envy their freedom from adult responsibilities. Many of us wonder if this is our life’s trajectory or if we should take the leap into something more fulfilling. This is the age when people start seeking alternative career paths, often leading to an influx of direct sales ventures. I’d love to write or speak for a living, but that opportunity hasn’t knocked yet, leaving me stuck in an endless loop of party invitations for products I don’t need. - Whose Kids Are These?
When I was younger, I imagined my children as well-behaved twins who always said “Yes, ma’am.” The reality is much different. My actual kids are chaotic forces of nature. They are adorable but come equipped with a level of mischief that leaves me questioning my sanity. As I juggle my life while ensuring they don’t harm themselves, I often wonder who allowed me to be the caretaker of these little tornadoes. - What’s Next?
My husband and I delayed starting a family, so while others our age are wrapping up their parenting journeys, we find ourselves at a crossroads: do we have more kids or embrace the ones we have? Retirement feels like an elusive dream, and I often wonder if Social Security will even exist by the time we reach that age. - When Did My Parents Become Smart?
Mid-30s is when you start echoing your parents’ advice that once drove you nuts. Suddenly, their wisdom seems spot on. Conversations that used to bore me have become treasures as I seek their counsel. - I Just Want to Netflix and Sleep.
Being in my mid-30s often feels like living in one of those relatable memes. My life is fueled by coffee and wine, and while social media showcases perfect family moments, my reality often involves cleaning up messes and wishing for a nap. I can’t remember the last time I had a moment to myself—will that ever change? - Target is My Sanctuary.
Honestly, all I crave is the chance to leisurely sip my coffee while wandering through Target. Shopping went from a chore to a form of therapy. Somehow, I always end up spending way more than intended and forgetting the essentials I came for, like toilet paper.
So, as I stare at my reflection, with tired eyes but a resilient spirit, I realize that while I may not be the youthful version of myself I envision, I have endured challenges, grown stronger, and learned to embrace the journey. If this is the path to 40, I’m ready for it.
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Summary:
Aging into your 30s and approaching 40 can be a comically chaotic experience filled with unexpected changes in body, mindset, and responsibilities. From grappling with skin issues and fashion dilemmas to reevaluating what success means and navigating parenthood, the journey is anything but glamorous. Embracing the reality of life’s complexities, while still finding joy in small moments, is key to thriving during this transitional period.