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A Cursing Mom’s Declaration
My kids are dressed in clean clothes, enjoy nutritious meals, bask in sunlight, and get plenty of exercise. Oh, and they also hear the word “dingleberry” more than I’d care to admit.
I’m a fan of swearing, and yes, I have kids. There, I said it.
When they were infants, my little ones likely drifted off to sleep listening to my soft mutterings of “Craptastic!” as I navigated their room, trying not to step on yet another Lego. Someday, those expletives might become their cherished nighttime lullabies.
Swearing is a joyous outlet, a source of entertainment, and a fantastic stress reliever. Using those so-called bad words doesn’t make me a bad parent. Seriously, it doesn’t. It doesn’t make me any less refined or inappropriate. It brings me joy and, dare I say, a good dose of humor. Studies even suggest that swearing can enhance my creativity and expand my vocabulary. Who wouldn’t want that?
Just because my favorite phrases might belong in a pirate’s glossary doesn’t mean I can’t use them in everyday life. Honestly, uttering “Gosh Darnit” or “Frickety Frack” feels utterly wrong when I’ve just stubbed my toe or spilled a box of cereal all over the floor. Those just don’t cut it in those moments. I need something more impactful—perhaps a “Clusterfudge” or a “Shitstorm” will do the trick. Saying words like “douche canoe” feels as natural to me as breathing or ranting about the price of avocados.
And yes, my kids hear me let these colorful words slip—sometimes they even echo what I say. But you know what? I’m not bothered. I’ve made plenty of sacrifices for my little munchkins, from becoming a morning person to enduring countless animated films. However, I won’t censor my language.
You might be concerned about my children, and that’s understandable. But trust me, we’ve instilled a strong sense of right and wrong in them, despite my enthusiastic swearing. For instance, they know that saying “fiddlesticks” in front of Grandma is a no-no. It’s also inappropriate to use colorful language in school, at church, or while chatting with the cashier at the grocery store. We have a rule against swearing at each other, even during heated moments.
We’ve taught them when it’s appropriate to let a curse word slip. Those words can add spice to a conversation or elicit laughter. There’s something undeniably hilarious about a toddler peering into the toilet after a successful potty visit and exclaiming, “Holy smokes!” That’s a story I’ll cherish forever, and it never fails to crack me up. Allowing them to swear around us helps them learn self-control and the importance of timing, even when it comes to words like “asshat.”
So, if my swearing philosophy makes you want to toss your keyboard into a nearby river, take a breath. The only kids I swear around are my own and a select few whose parents share my penchant for colorful language. We form a tight-knit crew of potty mouths, and guess what—our kids are still amazing human beings. Imagine that!
So, come join us—it’s liberating and good for the soul to let a few choice words fly every now and then. Trust me, I’m a professional at this.
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Summary
In this humorous declaration, Jenna Taylor embraces her love for swearing while navigating motherhood. She highlights the balance between being a loving parent and expressing herself with colorful language. Despite concerns from others, she reassures readers that her children are well-behaved and understand the importance of appropriate language use. With a lighthearted approach, she encourages others to embrace the joy of swearing in moderation, fostering creativity and laughter in their lives.