Most kids think they have it tough, no matter the circumstances. They might express delight over a shiny new toy one moment and then immediately start pining after what their friends have. Young ones are experts at comparing their lives to their peers, and as parents, that can be downright frustrating.
We already grapple with societal comparisons, so hearing our kids highlight our perceived shortcomings is just another layer of annoyance. My three children frequently remind me how their friends seem to have it better — later bedtimes, more allowance, you name it. It’s a daily reminder of what they think I lack.
And then there’s the classic line: “You’re way stricter than all our friends’ moms!” My son dropped that gem the other day, clearly believing it might sway my parenting decisions. Spoiler alert: it won’t.
I’m sure there are stricter mothers out there, but here’s my stance: Whether I’m the toughest mom on the block or the most lenient, I genuinely don’t care. What matters to me is raising my children in a manner that aligns with my values. They can label me the “mean mom” or stomp their feet and slam their doors — that’s their choice.
What truly irks me is when I feel tempted to alter my parenting approach to mirror someone else’s or to give in just because their friend Billy is allowed to. The idea of letting my kids dictate our family rules is a recipe for chaos. Sure, I listen to their opinions and allow them plenty of freedom, but I won’t always bend to their whims — they aren’t the ones in charge.
I refuse to let my teenage son set his curfew or dictate his overnight plans. And no, my tween daughter won’t be getting a $60 friendship piercing simply because her friends have one. If I disapprove of something they propose, it’s my duty as their mom to provide guidance and hold my ground.
If it means being the strict mom, then so be it. I didn’t become a parent to gain more friends; I wanted a family and to nurture kind, responsible individuals. I believe that structure and boundaries are essential in achieving that.
I understand that my parenting style may not resonate with everyone, and that’s perfectly fine. But come 18, I’m sure I’ll be getting plenty of texts from my kids asking for advice. For more insights into family and parenting, consider checking out this link on home insemination and resources like IVF Babble for those navigating similar journeys.
In summary, I embrace my role as the strict mom without apologies. My priority is ensuring my kids grow up healthy, happy, and grounded, even if that means they think I’m the mean one for now.