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I’m Frugal When It Comes to Myself
Updated: June 3, 2021
Originally Published: Dec. 19, 2016
Recently, a friend of mine reached out about a pair of high-end running pants she no longer needed. As fellow running enthusiasts, she recognized that these vibrant, premium-brand pants would be perfect for me. Imagine my delight when she offered them to me for free, citing “good karma” among runners. When they arrived, it felt like an early holiday gift. Honestly, I would have never splurged on such a luxury for myself.
Now, after a workout wearing my fabulous new running tights, I feel incredible. My stride had an extra bounce during my morning run, and the flattering fit gave me a boost of confidence as I jogged alongside traffic. Even my husband, who typically doesn’t notice my outfit changes, remarked on how great I looked as I headed out. These pants might become a permanent fixture in my wardrobe.
My frugality extends beyond just workout gear. Whether it’s clothing or any other personal item, I tend to hunt for the cheapest options, often driving myself mad in the process. I can get so overwhelmed seeking the best deal that I sometimes just give up altogether. Yet when it comes to spending on my family—friends, kids, or my husband—I’m more than willing to indulge. I easily buy that thoughtful gift for a friend or invest in a quality pair of shoes for my daughter each time she outgrows her old ones.
Recently, while discussing my reluctance to treat myself with other moms, they all nodded in agreement. We collectively struggle to recognize that we deserve to splurge occasionally. Despite knowing we could allocate some of the family budget for personal treats, we often hesitate. This led me to ponder the roots of our self-neglect.
As mothers, we are conditioned from the start to prioritize others. Whether it’s monitoring our diets while breastfeeding or sacrificing sleep for a child’s nightmares, we continually put ourselves last. We juggle multiple responsibilities daily, all of which is expected of us.
But here’s a wake-up call, ladies: it’s time to prioritize our own well-being. Taking care of ourselves is essential for us to care for our families effectively. It starts with acknowledging that we deserve that larger coffee or a slice of cake just for ourselves. It’s okay to skip the clearance section and buy those stylish sandals that make our legs look amazing. Spending on that fitness class you’ve been eyeing won’t derail the universe, nor will it stop time if you indulge in a shopping spree at your favorite bookstore.
Self-care is not selfish; it’s necessary. Motherhood is challenging enough, and if we wait for others to recognize our efforts, we might be waiting forever. When we take time for ourselves, we not only feel better but also show our families that we are worthy of care. By treating ourselves, we remind our children that the world doesn’t revolve solely around them.
So, go ahead and indulge. It doesn’t always need to be financial—take 20 minutes to relax before the kids come home; the laundry can wait. Spend a few moments catching up with a friend after a PTA meeting; your child won’t mind a slight delay in being picked up. Pause and ask your partner for a quick kiss in the kitchen; dinner can hold off for a moment. Or, skip the family movie and enjoy a long bath or a short nap. Make it a daily habit to do something nice for yourself and recognize how amazing you are as a parent. Whether it’s that spontaneous shopping trip at Target or simply enjoying a moment of peace, no one is judging you.
If you need me, I’ll be relaxing on the couch, admiring my new running pants and catching up on my favorite shows with a Venti Starbucks coffee in hand. When my kids return to a refreshed and smiling mom, that’s a win for the whole family.
For more insights on family planning, check out our other blog posts, like this one on intracervical insemination. If you’re looking for more information on at-home insemination kits, Make a Mom has some great resources. Additionally, for comprehensive information on fertility treatments, UCSF’s IVF resource is an excellent place to start.
In summary, it’s crucial for mothers to prioritize self-care. By recognizing our own worth and allowing ourselves to indulge, we not only improve our own well-being but also set an example for our families.