Once your child enters elementary school, they become instantly acquainted with the infamous ‘Box Top.’ I’m fairly certain that on the very first day, the teacher introduces herself, assigns desks, and then immediately instills in our kids the significance of THE BOX TOP!
“MOM! It supports our school!”
“Box Tops are helping us raise money for a new gymnasium!”
“Box Tops will take us to the theme park!”
“Box Tops SAVE THE WORLD!!”
These are just a few of the (possibly exaggerated) claims my child has made while we navigate the grocery store aisles.
Now, before you jump to conclusions and label me as an unsupportive parent (okay, maybe I am a bit unsupportive, but I do care about my child’s school), let me explain my situation. My child suffers from a perplexing skin condition that no one seems to understand. I’ve poured a fortune into conventional treatments and every alternative option out there.
Essential oils? You bet. Steroid creams? Absolutely. Blood tests? Check. Food allergies? Oh, you better believe it.
But have you ever spotted these Box Tops on organic products? I’ve scoured every aisle and found them on only a handful of organic items. Just a handful! The one thing that has genuinely helped my little one’s itchy skin is adhering to an organic diet. It’s frustrating, costly, and downright annoying, but I love my child and want her to be comfortable—so organic it is.
Organic = No Box Tops
No Box Tops = EVIL PARENT WHO DOESN’T WANT HER CHILD TO VISIT THE THEME PARK!
Honestly, it feels like companies like General Mills and the theme park are conspiring against me. It’s as if the universe knew I watched that documentary and decided to punish me with the dreaded Box Tops.
To avoid being a total jerk of a parent, I’ve taken to shopping at Costco for items that come with Box Tops but won’t irritate my daughter’s skin, like Ziploc bags. Each Costco run, we stock up enough Ziploc bags to last a lifetime, and we promptly dispose of the boxes as soon as we walk through the door. My kid then has her collection of Box Tops to take to school the next day, and all is well in the world. If there’s ever a Ziploc bag shortage, just know I’ve got you covered for years to come.
Recently, though, I’ve realized I don’t have enough space for these crushed Ziploc boxes. So, I’ve started searching for Box Tops in some rather unusual places—like eBay! Brilliant, right? Currently, I’m in a bidding war with another mom for 500 Box Tops. I’m leading the charge at a whopping $42.
After placing my “maximum bid” on these cardboard treasures that seem to hold the value of gold, I decided to investigate how much each Box Top is actually worth.
TEN CENTS.
That’s right, just TEN. FREAKING. CENTS. Had I known that each product I deliberately buy because of the ‘Box Top’ translates to a mere ten-cent contribution, I might as well hand my child a dime every time we stroll down the grocery aisle. Honestly, wouldn’t that be more efficient?
So, since I lost the bidding war to BoxTopWarrior92 on eBay, I’m pulling out that crumpled $20 bill from my wallet and driving straight to the bank to exchange it for 200 dimes. That should keep us stocked for at least the next year, considering that’s two hundred Box Tops.
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In summary, while the quest for Box Tops can feel overwhelming and somewhat ridiculous, the lengths we go to support our children’s schools often lead us down unexpected paths. But at the end of the day, we just want what’s best for our kids, even if it means navigating the strange world of Box Tops.
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