Dear Nana and Papa,
First off, a huge thank you for agreeing to watch the kids while my partner and I sneak away for some much-needed downtime. I genuinely appreciate your willingness to step in, but there are a few important things I’d like to address to ensure our return is as smooth as possible.
- Limit the Candy: Please avoid turning my kids into sugar-fueled tornadoes. I’ve noticed that the moment I leave, you tend to shower them with sweets like they’re at a carnival. If I come back to hyperactive children bouncing off the walls, I might just lose it!
- Background Noise: Try not to let the TV become a constant companion. Keeping it on at full blast doesn’t really count as background noise. If they spend the entire time entranced by the screen, they might just turn into little zombies.
- Stick to Approved Shows: Let’s keep their viewing habits in check. I’d prefer they don’t get hooked on any of those irritating shows that make them come back with new catchphrases and habits that drive me crazy.
- Safety First: The usual safety measures—seat belts, helmets, and the like—are non-negotiable. I know you joke about the wild things you did as kids, but this is serious. My children’s safety is paramount!
- Supervised Playtime: Please don’t let them roam outside all day without checks. While playing outside can be fun, it’s essential to know who they are with and what they’re doing.
- Respect Bedtime: Bedtime is not a suggestion. Allowing them to stay up late for some impromptu fun isn’t a good idea. They need their rest, especially if they want to be well-behaved when we return.
- No Skipping Activities: I know you think a break from school could be a special treat, but education is key. Missing classes or activities isn’t a reward; it’s a setback.
- Avoid Unwanted Items: I’d prefer to return to a house without new, loud toys or anything else that could drive me up the wall. If you feel the urge to give gifts, please keep it simple—like something practical.
- Take Emergencies Seriously: When I provide emergency contacts, please don’t dismiss them. It’s not about your skills; it’s about having the right information at your fingertips when needed.
- Facilitate Communication: If the kids express that they miss us, don’t tell them we’re unreachable. Let them use video calls to chat with us. It’s important for them to feel connected.
Thanks for understanding these points! Enjoy your time with the kids. And remember, we will be making some big decisions about your future living arrangements one day!
Warm regards,
The Parents
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Summary
This piece humorously highlights ten things grandparents should avoid while babysitting their grandchildren to ensure that parents return to well-behaved kids. Emphasizing safety, consistency, and communication, it offers a light-hearted yet earnest reminder of the challenges of childcare.