Pregnancy can be a beautiful journey, but when you’re over 40, it often comes with an array of unsolicited questions and comments that can leave you scratching your head. My friend Annie, for instance, was taken aback when someone asked her if her doctor had approved her to actually carry a child. At 42, she chuckled, “Well, if Halle Berry can have a baby at 46, I’m sure I can manage just fine!”
Annie’s pregnancy came a decade after her first child, and while she received a fair share of encouraging remarks, she also faced a barrage of thoughtless, prying questions that left her silently fuming. Her strategy? Smile, nod, and pretend to answer an imaginary phone call to escape the conversation.
While she never intended to become a mother again at 42, the prospect of not expanding her family felt far worse. People often don’t want to understand your journey or the careful thought that goes into bringing a new life into the world, especially when it doesn’t align with their timeline. Below are some ridiculous queries she encountered or wished she had the perfect retorts for:
How did this happen?
Oh, you know, just like everyone else—over a shared bottle of wine and a romantic night. Conception is timeless!
You got pregnant without medical assistance?
This question, often asked by medical staff and curious acquaintances, is not only invasive but irrelevant. My medical history is for my doctor’s ears only, thank you. Can someone just tell me how fabulous I look instead?
Are you more exhausted than in your 30s?
Absolutely! Before pregnancy, I was already a night owl, and now I go to bed at 2:30 PM. Sure, the fatigue hits differently than it did at 32, but I’ve gained wisdom, happiness, and a solid relationship. Plus, pour-over bullet coffee has become my best friend!
This is definitely your last baby, right?
Maybe, maybe not. But thanks for the concern, Mom. Can we table the discussion about my reproductive future until I’m ready to talk about it?
You’ll be HOW old when she’s in college?
Oh, we’ve already decided she’ll take a gap year to become a pottery artist in Punta Cana. Age is just a number, right?
Are you planning to get married?
The beauty of being a parent past the age of parental judgment is that the answer is a simple “nope.”
What does your mom think?
She’s thrilled, actually! While she might worry about my age, she’s excited to have another little one to spoil. And she’s already eyeing cute baby outfits on clearance!
You know things have changed since your last pregnancy, right?
Absolutely! Technology has advanced, and parenting tools have improved, but at the heart of it, parenting remains the same across generations. Thanks for your unsolicited advice!
Are you worried people will think you’re her grandmother?
If they do, I’ll just roll with it. Better to be mistaken for a sister than an old librarian with overdue books!
Wow. Great?
It’s truly amazing! I’m nourishing a future human being! Please raise a glass in celebration—just don’t suggest names that are anything less than unique.
If you’re expecting and navigating this journey over 40, remember that you’re not alone. You can read more about experiences like these in our other blog post here or check out this great resource for pregnancy information. And if you’re considering at-home insemination, this site offers reputable options for syringe kits.
In summary, while the questions can be absurd, remember that your journey is uniquely yours, and you have every right to embrace it with pride and joy!
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