Listen up, little one. You’re the youngest in the family—the cherished baby who will always hold that title. We’ll let you mispronounce words because it’s simply adorable. We’ll create playful code names for treats because we want to keep the best snacks to ourselves. We’ll indulge in baby toys and fun adventures because we’re just not ready to say goodbye to this precious stage of childhood.
But those aren’t the reasons I’m putting off your potty training.
Here’s the truth, sweetheart: I’ve been through the wringer with your siblings.
- The constant battle of keeping underwear on.
- The chaos of trying to keep those boys from touching their private parts.
- The endless checks to decipher whether it was a fart, a poop, or something in between.
- The pee puddles everywhere.
- The stained mattresses—enough said.
- The mountain of dirty sheets I could build a fort with.
- The splatter on the bathroom walls that just won’t quit.
- The overwhelming smell of urine in every bathroom, as each toilet had to be tested multiple times a day—except when the faucet was running.
- The never-ending hand-washing adventures, where large mom hands and tiny toddler butts collide.
- The chaos from hand-washing because, of course, toddlers need to clean up after themselves, too.
- The arguments over how much to drink before bedtime.
- The midnight disturbances when even a tiny sip leads to a full-blown bathroom emergency.
- The sheer panic when faced with public restrooms.
- The soaked car seats.
- The perpetual need to stay vigilant about potty breaks.
I’ll assist you in the bathroom if you ask, but honestly, I have other things to manage than asking if you need to urinate every ten minutes just to avoid pee stains on the carpet. The diaper bag is meant for diapers, and it will be retired without any in-between use as an emergency outfit stash because I was too eager to transition you out of Pull-Ups. That bag has seen better days. It’s worn out and needs a break, much like me. It deserves a peaceful retirement in the backseat, only to be used occasionally before heading to the donation bin.
The reality is, I’ve adopted a more laid-back parenting style that doesn’t align with potty training right now. If you need to go and can’t manage your pants, just use the diaper. You’re only two—there’s plenty of time before you need to master the porcelain throne. My to-do list is already overflowing without having to dedicate hours to watching you dribble a few drops into the toilet, stop you from using half a roll of toilet paper to wipe, rewind the roll, and then run to wash your hands—all just to repeat the process in another fifteen minutes and discover a surprise behind the stove later.
So, I’m stepping back from this one. You’ll figure it out before kindergarten, no doubt. And if not, perhaps your dad will take the reins on potty training.
For more insights on parenting, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination, and if you’re interested in artificial insemination, you can learn more about it here.
Summary
Deciding to delay potty training for my youngest child stems from the challenges I faced with my older children—endless messes, sleepless nights, and the chaos that comes with early toilet training. With my parenting style embracing a more relaxed approach, I’ll wait until they’re ready rather than push for quick results.