It’s that time of year again when the extravagant Goop Holiday Gift Guide makes its annual appearance! Led by the ever-ambitious lifestyle guru, Lydia Harper, this year’s edition promises to leave you both amused and bewildered. With gifts ranging from the absurd to the downright unattainable, it’s a celebration of luxury that most of us can only dream about.
Lydia has once again outdone herself, curating a collection of gifts that will make you chuckle, weep, and perhaps even feel a bit envious of the wealth on display. This year, she has cheekily introduced a section titled “Ridiculous (and Awesome) Gifts,” which truly showcases the heights of opulence. Here are some standouts:
- Toothpaste Squeezer, $244
Perfect for the person who believes that squeezing their own toothpaste is far too plebeian. Instead, they can invest in a shiny chrome-plated contraption that practically screams, “I have too much space on my bathroom counter!” - 18k Gold Dumbbells, $125,000
Custom-made and presumably heavy, these dumbbells are not clarified in weight. Just a symbol of indulgence, perhaps? - Hermes Mah-Jong Set, $46,000
Yes, there’s a waiting list for this luxurious version of a classic game. If you’re feeling impatient, why not just burn a pile of cash instead? - World View Exploration At The Edge Of Space, $90,000
For a mere $90,000, you can experience breathtaking views of Earth from a luxury capsule that will ascend 100,000 feet. At this point, are we even surprised? - Do-It-Yourself Vaginal Steamer, $55
An intriguing entry on the list, this quirky contraption claims to offer the ancient art of yoni steaming. Who knew self-care could look so bizarre?
Now, one might hope that some sections could offer more down-to-earth options. For instance, let’s explore “Gifts for the Doer”:
- Live the Process Corset Unitard, $260
Marketed as a workout outfit, it’s equally suitable for lounging. Because nothing says “relaxation” quite like a corset.
And for the men in your life?
- Post-Poo Drops, $29
Described as essential. Really? This gift is a new low, marketed to neutralize unpleasant bathroom odors. A charming holiday gesture!
And finally, my personal favorite:
- Toilet Paper, $956
Yes, fancy-wrapped toilet paper. It’s truly the crème de la crème for that friend who has everything.
In sum, Lydia Harper has once again presented us with a gift guide that mixes humor with an eye-watering showcase of wealth. While many of the items are ludicrously extravagant, they do offer a lighthearted look at the world of high-end gifting.
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