As a pediatrician with over two decades of experience, I’ve seen firsthand how the landscape of parenting has changed. In the mid-’90s, when the internet was still in its infancy, parents relied on friends and family for advice. Fast forward to today, and being offline is almost a rebellious act. While the internet can provide comfort (like discovering that your child’s rash is harmless) it can also breed guilt and shame (as if failing to use organic baby food will doom the planet).
Not long ago, a parenting initiative called #noshameparenting was launched, aimed at alleviating some of the guilt that comes with raising children. It’s a much-needed reminder that parenting decisions should not lead to feelings of inadequacy. Unfortunately, articles claiming that letting children watch TV can diminish their potential still pop up, creating a cycle of anxiety among parents.
Shame is counterproductive. It pushes people into hiding and prevents honest conversations about parenting struggles. So, let’s clarify what we should feel good about and what we should reconsider:
What You Should NOT Be Ashamed Of:
- Feeding your baby formula, breast milk, or even goat milk. All forms of milk provide vital nutrition.
- Turning your toddler’s car seat forward-facing when they meet the weight requirement. Contrary to what some social media posts might suggest, they don’t need to be rear-facing until five.
- Your child enjoying educational programs on PBS. These shows can enhance their learning experience.
- Giving your child Benadryl for a minor allergy. Sleep is crucial for children’s development.
- Skipping bath night. A little dirt can be harmless.
- Using either cloth or disposable diapers; it’s all part of the process of parenting.
- Not always finding time to read bedtime stories. Life gets busy.
What You Should Be Ashamed Of:
- Giving your baby sugary chocolate milk. That’s simply unnecessary.
- Not using a car seat at all. That’s a serious safety risk.
- Letting your kids watch Caillou. Seriously, no one benefits from that constant whining.
- Giving them alcohol. That crosses a line into abuse.
- If your kids don’t get bathed until they resemble a small garden.
- If you are practicing elimination communication and your child is using your neighbor’s floor as a toilet. That’s just inconsiderate.
- If the story you choose is something like Stephen King’s It—that’s just terrifying for kids.
From my experience, the everyday choices we make in parenting are not worth agonizing over. The mom judging your choices? She likely hasn’t faced the challenge of a two-hour car ride with a screaming toddler.
If you’re interested in more about navigating the complexities of parenting, feel free to explore our other blog posts, such as the one on home insemination. Additionally, for a comprehensive resource on fertility and pregnancy, visit Facts About Fertility. And if you’re looking for essential tools to aid in the process, check out this artificial insemination kit.
In summary, let’s focus on supporting each other rather than shaming one another. Parenting is hard enough without adding guilt to the mix.