Is your child’s diet limited to just a handful of foods? Do you find yourself serving the same few meals repeatedly? While it’s easy to label your child as a picky eater, research indicates that “selective eating” can be associated with anxiety, depression, and ADHD, as highlighted in a study published in Pediatrics and reported by the New York Times.
This correlation makes sense. Kids who experience anxiety often hesitate to try new things—whether it’s unfamiliar playground equipment, chatting with new friends, or adapting to a new teacher. Food can easily become a part of that hesitation. The researchers also noted that picky eaters might possess heightened sensitivity: “Their sensory experience is more intense in the areas of taste, texture, and visual cues. And their internal experience may be more intense, so they have stronger feelings,” said Dr. Emily Fields, the study’s lead author.
While a typical eater might munch on a stick of celery or savor a beet without much thought, a picky eater might avoid those foods entirely due to uncomfortable textures.
Reading this made me reflect on my own experiences. I struggle with anxiety myself and tend to favor comfort foods like meat, pasta, bread, and dairy—foods that provide a familiar sense of calm. While I have a few fruits and veggies I enjoy, many can be a gamble. For instance, who can resist juicy peaches in summer? But supermarket strawberries in winter? Yikes! Just too sour for my liking. Tomatoes? Perfect in the summer, but the rest of the year? No thanks. And let’s not even talk about bok choy or broccoli unless it’s roasted to perfection.
For a long time, I attributed my preferences to my upbringing—a classic American diet focused on meat and starches. But maybe it’s really about the sourness of strawberries or the texture of broccoli. Those foods don’t deliver the same comforting rush I get from a grilled cheese sandwich paired with tomato soup.
I don’t believe my kids struggle with anxiety—they seem like well-adjusted, sociable little beings. However, they share my love for grilled cheese and tomato soup, making it a challenge to introduce new foods to them. They’re definitely more selective when it comes to fruits and veggies, and I’ve often felt guilty about not being able to get them to enjoy greens and fruits.
We adhere to Ellyn Satter’s division of responsibility approach, which is fairly simple: I choose what’s for dinner, and the kids decide what they want to eat from their plates and how much. There’s no pressure, no bargaining.
This method has worked reasonably well, but it’s undeniable that they prefer carbs and meat over fruits and veggies. The recent study has alleviated some of my guilt, reminding me that not every food is going to be a hit. Whether they have anxiety or ADHD or are just naturally picky, it isn’t necessarily a result of not being exposed enough to different flavors or because they’re staging a mini-rebellion at the dinner table. I can finally ease some of that guilt.
Moreover, this serves as a reminder that parenting is a holistic endeavor. “It underscores that food is not an isolated issue; it plays a vital role in overall development,” Dr. Laura Jana, a pediatrician, stated. Parenting revolves around the bigger picture, focusing on raising children who are reasonably nourished while fostering cooking skills and a varied palate over time. This development doesn’t happen overnight—it’s a long-term journey.
In the meantime, Dr. Jana advises sticking to the division of responsibility at mealtimes and stresses that family dinners should center around connection rather than just food. We should encourage our kids to enjoy the company as much as the meal, so go ahead and serve that third grilled cheese this week—no guilt needed!
If you’re interested in learning more about family-building options, check out this excellent resource from Resolve. And for those looking to explore various home insemination techniques, you can find helpful information at Make a Mom. Remember, parenting is a journey, not just a series of mealtime battles.
Summary:
This article discusses the common concerns of parents with picky eaters, highlighting the potential links to anxiety and sensitivity in taste, texture, and visual cues. It encourages parents to let go of guilt over their children’s food preferences, emphasizing the importance of a holistic approach to parenting that fosters long-term development and enjoyment of family meals.