Recently, I took the plunge and explored New York City, San Francisco, and Ensenada. Each place had its own quirks and charm, but no matter how much I enjoyed my adventures, there’s no place like the Midwest. It truly is a wonderful region to grow up in and eventually settle down.
Do you feel the same way about the Midwest? Here are some telltale signs that you might be a true Midwesterner:
- You find yourself praying for rain to nourish the crops, only to later wish for it to stop so farmers can get back to work.
- You’re terrified of hurricanes and earthquakes, yet when the tornado sirens wail, you rush outside to see what’s happening.
- Your experience on gravel roads far exceeds that of paved ones.
- You’ve been stuck behind a long line of vehicles waiting to pass a combine on the highway.
- Your first driving lesson was on a tractor, not a car.
- You can name the exact month for wheat, corn, and soybean harvests and know when everyone is hauling hay.
- You know that unmistakable scent of a feedlot.
- Ball caps on guys and perpetually windblown hair on gals? Totally normal.
- Catfish is on nearly every restaurant menu, and seeing frog legs isn’t all that unusual.
- When relatives from out of state come to visit, you introduce them to the fine arts of cow tipping or snipe hunting.
- You can buy fish bait right next to the sandwiches at the local convenience store.
- Every summer, you’ll find a pickup truck on almost every corner selling fresh veggies or melons from the tailgate.
- Dressing up means wearing your least faded jeans, a button-up shirt, and giving your boots a quick polish.
- You’ve slowed down your vehicle to avoid hitting a turtle, snake, raccoon, or even a cow.
- Your yard boasts a tire swing and a half-built treehouse.
- You spent your childhood swimming in a pond or a creek.
- You’ve had to scrape cow manure off your boots—more than once!
- You know exactly what mountain oysters are.
- The local vet is on speed dial, and he knows your address as soon as you mention your name.
- You can mount a horse from the correct side and cinch a saddle like a pro.
- You’ve played in a hayloft, collected fresh eggs, or had a run-in with an overzealous rooster.
- You’ve worked a pump handle and savored the taste of well water.
In case you’re curious about more insights into home insemination and family planning, check out this article from our friends at Intracervical Insemination. Also, for a reliable resource on home insemination, UCSF is worth a visit.
This article originally appeared on July 22, 2015.
In summary, if you can relate to these quirky traits, you’re likely a proud Midwesterner at heart!