By the time you’re reading this, there’s a good chance I’ll have had a close encounter of the finned kind. Right now, I’m basking in the sun with my family at the sunny shores of Surf City, North Carolina—a place that has apparently become a hotspot for shark activity. Just moments ago, my husband returned from the beach with our kids, reporting an actual shark sighting in the water. And if that wasn’t enough, we spotted at least five people on the fishing pier proudly showing off the little sharks they caught.
I may not be a math whiz, but I can read the headlines, and the numbers are alarming—there have been several shark bites in North Carolina over the past month. While other coastal towns are also facing these toothy predators, Surf City seems to be the epicenter of these aquatic attacks. I’m dubbing it “Shark City,” and I’m the only one who seems concerned about it.
At the time of this writing, Surf City has recorded two shark attacks, making it a prime target for those fishy foes auditioning for the next Jaws sequel. It’s enough to make me wish WikiHow would amend its article on “How to Avoid Sharks” to include “Don’t vacation in Surf City, North Carolina.”
As a responsible parent, I’m determined to return from this trip with all my limbs intact. I’ve been staying updated on the latest news and safety tips, hoping to prepare my family for any unexpected encounters with these underwater creatures. My priority is to keep my four kids, aged 6 to 10, informed about sharks without scaring them so much that they refuse to enjoy the beach, turning into sobbing messes in their swimsuits. I’ve taken it upon myself to keep a watchful eye.
Striking a balance between having fun and avoiding becoming a shark snack is no easy feat. We’ve been splashing around in what I’ve learned is not-so-safe waist-deep water while I pretend to watch my kids. In reality, my eyes are scanning the ocean, ready to respond if a shark happens to make an appearance (screaming and praying is my plan).
So far, I’ve yet to spot a shark, but my imagination has conjured up at least 37 “phantom” sharks lurking beneath the waves. At one point, I mistook my own 10-year-old’s head bobbing up from the water for a hungry shark, nearly giving her a punch in a moment of panic.
It’s during this vacation—dubbed our “Sharkation”—that I’ve realized a lot about myself. I’ve figured out which child I’d save first (the smallest, naturally, since the others are too heavy), and I’ve come to terms with not wanting to sacrifice myself for a hungry sea creature. If it comes to that, I’d prefer it be my husband who takes the plunge while I calmly rush him to the hospital—thank goodness for our good insurance!
But it’s too late for me to back out of this vacation, so I’ve turned to the internet for self-defense tips against sharks. Here’s what I’ve discovered:
Internet Shark Knowledge vs. Beach Reality
- Internet Shark Knowledge: Hitting a shark on the nose will send it swimming away in tears.
Beach Reality: While the nose may be a sensitive area, the odds of a mere human prevailing over a shark in this way are somewhere between zero and sushi. - Internet Shark Knowledge: Don’t pee in the water.
Beach Reality: I’ve told my kids that the ocean is their personal bathroom; I’m not hauling them back to the beach house just because someone needs to “go.” - Internet Shark Knowledge: Stay away from areas with previous shark attacks.
Beach Reality: We booked this trip months ago and can’t just switch to another resort on a whim. - Internet Shark Knowledge: Bring a weapon if you’re swimming near sharks.
Beach Reality: The only thing scarier than a shark is my kids wielding spearguns—they’re no Annie Oakley! - Internet Shark Knowledge: Know your sharks.
Beach Reality: When I spot a dorsal fin, I think “shark,” no matter what it actually is. - Internet Shark Knowledge: Sharks love to hang around turtle nesting areas.
Beach Reality: Of course, the beach I’m on has turtle nests every few feet. Great.
Despite the real danger, I’m choosing to embrace the fun. We’re soaking up the sun, indulging in ice cream, and enjoying cocktails (because who even knows what day it is?). We’re making memories together while keeping a watchful eye out for any toothy creatures. Until we actually see one, we’re all about living life to the fullest—shark sightings be damned!
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In summary, while the threat of shark bites is certainly real, my family is determined to enjoy our vacation in Surf City. We’re balancing caution with fun, keeping our spirits high, and making the most of our time together while keeping an eye out for any lurking fins.