There was a time when I thought I’d rather be a solo mom than parade a series of men in front of my kids—especially when their biological father had ghosted on us, leaving behind a trail of flimsy excuses. But then along came Mark, the first person I felt comfortable introducing to my boys after a long time. He was the kind of man I hoped they would emulate as they grew up.
I didn’t go out looking for a dad-in-a-box—believe me, they don’t sell those at Target! Yet, somehow, I found this gem. I promised myself I wouldn’t be the type to compromise my children’s well-being for the sake of a man or to avoid the fear of being alone forever, with a menagerie of cats and a collection of tacky romance novels. (Pro tip: avoiding becoming the “cat lady” is simple—just don’t get any cats!) In the end, I was fortunate to find one of the good ones.
To all the stepdads, stand-in fathers, and those wonderful men stepping up to raise kids who aren’t biologically theirs: thank you. You don’t have to do any of this, yet you choose to love our children, often out of love for their mother. We appreciate you every single day—even when chaos reigns and we forget to express it (seriously, who let that one rip?!).
Thank you for caring about their table manners and for ensuring they don’t nap through elementary school like it’s a marathon. Your frustration over kids claiming they’re “full” yet devouring ice cream later is completely relatable. While you’re probably tired of saying “Finish your dinner,” we’re just glad someone else is stepping up!
Thanks for accepting the wild, naked antics of our boys who prefer freedom over clothing and are completely oblivious to modesty—unless, of course, Mom walks in! You’re the reason Mother’s Day is filled with flowers, candy, and a much-needed breather. Seriously, can we make that a monthly holiday?
Thank you for knowing when to put an end to the obnoxious burps (or, on good days, showing them how it’s really done). We appreciate your consistency in enforcing our household rules and the tougher consequences for misbehavior. You might be stricter than we are, but sometimes kids need a firm hand, even if their mom is a little softer on them.
Your ability to help us relax and give our kids a little more freedom is a gift. We’re scared—after all, they’re our little ones in a big, unpredictable world. But you care about them growing into strong, principled individuals. When you tell them “no means no,” it resonates deeper than you might think—it’s a lesson that they’ll carry with them.
Thank you for being patient with our shy ones, allowing them to warm up to you at their own pace. Your quiet affection—a kiss on the head when they’re not paying attention—makes a world of difference. The hugs they give you, as big and tight as they can muster, are a testament to the bond you’re building.
Thank you for the silly voices, the wild tickle battles, and the bedtime stories that may come with a bit of a wobbly voice. You’re providing a fatherly presence that they may not have otherwise experienced. They might not call you “Dad”—yet—but you are already that to them, filled with dad jokes and all.
My kids have no idea how lucky they are that “Mr. Mark” chose to join our family, ignoring his own past reservations about raising another man’s child. They don’t know about his history, the promises he made to himself, or the courage it took for him to step into our lives. I love and appreciate him more than he’ll ever fully grasp—even when I wish he and the boys would stop with all the shenanigans!
Thank you, and Happy Father’s Day!