My mom’s birthday was coming up, and since it fell on a Thursday, I thought it would be the perfect time to post a nostalgic photo of her on my personal Facebook page. I wanted a classic snapshot of her from the 70s—something that captured her essence as a young mother. After rummaging through some dusty old photo albums tucked under my bed, I found the ideal image of her lounging in the backyard, soaking up the sun.
As I flipped through the pages, I discovered other gems: her blissfully sprawled out on a beach chair, or relaxing on a brown tweed couch with her feet up, surrounded by macrame plant holders. There were even cute shots of her with my dad next to his motorcycle or sharing a meal with me as a toddler (seriously, I was probably just three years old, so someone should probably call child protective services!). In every picture, she exuded beauty and tranquility.
But where were my siblings and I? Likely off playing down the street without a care in the world—unaccompanied! Can you even imagine that now? Back then, helicopter parenting hadn’t yet intruded upon her generation, which perhaps explains the relaxed demeanor in her photos.
As I shared her birthday post, I found myself wondering if my sons would ever come across a similar picture of me in the future. I glanced at the towering stack of scrapbooks in my living room, filled with countless memories: first steps, birthday celebrations, and school events. Yet, as I sifted through them, I realized that finding a photo of myself would be a challenge. The only one I could find was from a hospital bed, cradling a newborn.
What about those years after that moment? The baby grew, but the woman behind the camera—what happened to her? Motherhood, of course! I became the family photographer, documenting the lives of my children while I remained invisible in the background. Year after year, I captured their milestones without ever stepping into the frame myself.
Sure, I have a few selfies—mostly sweaty post-run shots aimed at inspiring others to get moving. I’ve snapped the occasional clean hair selfie after a rare shower! My Instagram is filled with pictures of my boys, nature, and even some quirky moments from our life, but you won’t find many images of the woman who is also their mom.
The last carefree picture of me was taken during my honeymoon, years ago. There were no kids in that frame—just me, the woman before motherhood took over. That was almost 18 years ago, and it struck me how much time has passed.
As I reflected on my life spent behind the camera, I realized I needed to change that. Today, on my mom’s birthday, I asked my 11-year-old son to take a picture of me. “Just you?” he asked, surprised. “Yes, just me!” I replied, sitting on my beloved front porch, where I wanted him to remember me. “In 30 years, you’ll want to find this picture, and I want it to be here for you.”
So, fellow moms, it’s your turn! Make sure you step into the spotlight of your life. Create memories that include you, because your children will cherish those moments in the years to come. If you’re curious about how to navigate parenting and insemination, check out our other blog posts at Home Insemination Kit and learn more about the process and resources at Medical News Today.
In summary, it’s essential to be present in your own story, not just behind the camera. Capture those moments that define you as a person and a mother, so your children can look back and remember the woman who shaped their lives.