Hey there, my fabulous gals! I just want to say how much I admire each of you and how much I can’t stand those basement trolls who think they can shame you online. Honestly, their negativity says a lot more about them than it does about you. But enough about them—it’s time for a heart-to-heart!
To Hannah
First up, Hannah—your comfort with nudity is simply fantastic, and I wholeheartedly encourage you to embrace it! Who cares what anyone else thinks? If they dare to comment, just say the word, and I’ll handle them myself!
To Marnie
Now, Marnie, let’s chat about that kitchen counter moment that had the internet buzzing. While I’m all for you exploring your sexuality in whatever way feels right, I have to ask: Did you truly enjoy it? I know you seemed to be having a blast, but were you really into it, or just trying to keep Desi happy? Remember, darling, it’s all about you getting yours—and I mean an actual orgasm!
To Shosh
And Shosh, I promise the job hunt won’t last forever! I admire your adventurous spirit this past season, even if academics took a backseat. Trust me, I once flunked a class because I was too busy enjoying my boyfriend’s company. It happens to the best of us!
To Jessa
Jessa, my dear, it looks like you’ve been on quite a rough ride lately. You seemed to be using your encounters to mask deeper issues rather than seeking genuine pleasure. How about focusing on self-love for a while? If you don’t have a good vibrator, don’t worry—I’ll send you a care package!
Back to Hannah
Now, Hannah, I know you’re feeling heartbroken over Adam (spoiler alert!), but this is not the end of your world. More relationships will come your way, even if Adam was a great match for you (minus the shower incident, of course). You shared a lot of intimacy, but were you truly present during those moments? Sometimes it felt like you were mentally drafting texts instead of enjoying the experience. It’s crucial to be hungry for your partner, to crave that toe-curling ecstasy.
The only time you really let go was with that charming older doctor in his stunning brownstone. You allowed yourself to be taken care of, which is what I wish for all of you: pure bliss. Consider taking an Orgasmic Meditation workshop now that you’re single—it could be a game-changer!
Us Gen-Xers made plenty of mistakes in our youth. We often had sex that was more about performance than pleasure, thanks to a society that taught us to undervalue our own desires. We wanted to be desired but didn’t know how to truly want. This is something you should start unlearning now rather than later. Let’s close that orgasm gap by the end of the season, shall we?
With love,
Your Fun Aunt
P.S. For more tips on self-exploration and pleasure, check out our blog on intracervicalinsemination.com. Also, if you’re looking for resources on home insemination, Make a Mom is a great authority on the subject. Additionally, for pregnancy-related information, NHS offers excellent resources.
Summary
This letter to the young women of ‘Girls’ encourages them to embrace their sexuality, prioritize their own pleasure, and learn from past mistakes. It highlights the importance of being present and fully engaged in relationships, promoting self-love and exploration, and provides resources for further learning.